The Brontë Family, with special reference to Patrick Branwell Brontë. Vol. 1 of 2Leyland, Francis A.
History
The Brontë Family, with special reference to Patrick Branwell Brontë. Vol. 1 of 2
Leyland, Francis A.
Authors, English -- 19th century -- Biography; Brontë family; Brontë, Patrick Branwell, 1817-1848
forgotten, and never said.' Charlotte began to fear some time must
elapse before her plans could be executed, and she resolved not to
relinquish her situation till something was assured. But this
expectation of keeping a school, cherished through long years, was
never realized by the sisters; ever and anon the shifting sands of
circumstance, the changing currents of life, moved them away, even
while they believed themselves approaching the goal of their hopes.
Charlotte returned to her situation, and she tells her friend, in a
letter dated August the 7th, 1841, that she 'felt herself' again. Mr.
and Mrs. ---- were from home, and she takes the opportunity of saying
that to be solitary there was to her the happiest part of her time.
She enters into particulars of the household: the children were under
decent control, and the servants were observant and attentive to her;
she says of herself, moreover, that the absence of the master and
mistress relieved her from the duty of always putting on the
appearance of being cheerful and conversable.
Her friends, Martha and Mary T----, were enjoying great advantages on
the Continent, where they had gone to stay a month with their
brother. Charlotte had had a long letter from Mary, and a packet
enclosing a handsome black silk scarf, and a pair of beautiful kid
gloves bought in Brussels as a present. She was pleased with them,
and that she had been remembered so far off, amidst the excitement of
'one of the most splendid capitals of Europe.' Mary's letters spoke
of 'some of the pictures and cathedrals she had seen--pictures the
most exquisite, cathedrals the most venerable.' Something swelled to
the throat of Charlotte as she read this account. She was seized with
a 'vehement impatience of restraint and steady work; such a strong
wish for wings--wings such as wealth can furnish; such an urgent
thirst to see, to know, to learn; something internal seemed to expand
bodily for a minute.' She was tantalized for a time by the
consciousness of faculties unexercised; then all collapsed. She
considered these emotions, momentary as they were, rebellious and
absurd, and they were speedily quelled by the resolute spirit they
had disturbed. She hoped they would not revive, as they had been
acutely painful. The school project, instead of at all fading, was
gaining strength, and the three sisters kept it in view as the
pole-star round which all their other schemes, as of lesser
importance, revolved. To this they looked in their despondency.
Charlotte was haunted, sometimes, and dismayed, at the conviction
that she had no natural knack for her occupation. She says that, if
teaching only were requisite, all would be smooth and easy; and she
adds, 'but it is the living in other people's houses--the
estrangement from one's real character--the adoption of a cold,
rigid, apathetic exterior, that is painful.'
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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