'There is not much to report; two fellows are in "the shop" for absence from parade; one in the cells, for being drunk and disorderly; and little Fuddie, the drummer, has cut his stick--or sticks, should I say? Probably finding, as Sterne has it, that "the honour of beating a drum was likely to be its own reward," he has taken French leave and bolted. If caught, we should duck the fellow in the Clyde, but for the seventh clause of the sixth section on "Discipline," which prevents the adoption of punishments in detachments that are at variance with those in use at headquarters.' Falconer continued to smoke in silence, so Fotheringhame spoke again. 'England expects every man to do his duty--but as cheaply as possible--for next to nothing, in fact; so, after your late surroundings, the luxury of my quarters will fail to impress you as either being useful or ornamental--as a certain poem has it, here are-- '"Apparatus for washing: a pail and a can, Part of an Army List, half of a fan, A fawn-coloured glove, a lock of false hair-- Both highly prized gifts from some lady fair; A case of blunt razors, a shako and plume; A fishing-rod, shot-belt, rifle, and broom; An invite to dinner, the card of a priest, A sketch of the colonel described as 'a beast.'"' While Fotheringhame ran on laughingly thus, Falconer was silent and pre-occupied, or replied only by a faint smile. Leslie Fotheringhame was a handsome man, but of a different type from Cecil Falconer. He was taller and more squarely built, with deep-set and grave dark-blue eyes, the expression of which generally belied his merry manner; he was dark-haired, with a firm mouth, a clear dark skin and ponderous black moustache. His manner was ever honest, frank, and pleasant; and though his turn of mind was somewhat cynical--as if he had met with some disappointment in life--his face at times wore a smile that lit it up like a sunbeam. Though junior to Cecil Falconer in the regiment, he was his senior by some years; for he had once been a captain of Lancers, but sold his troop, no one knew why, and afterwards obtained a non-purchase commission in the Cameronians. He was also greatly Cecil's senior in experience. He was wont to boast that he had, by a fluke, escaped the perilous meshes of matrimony, though the mess rather opined that he had been disappointed, 'thrown over,' by some girl, though none exactly knew the story. 'What is doing at headquarters?' asked Falconer. 'Birkie of that Ilk has sent in his papers.' 'Birkie--why?' 'Lost a pot of money on a hurdle-race at Streatham--it's a step in the regiment; but everyone is very, sorry for poor Birkie. Acharn has got into a scrape with a widow, whose husband suddenly turned up, so he has gone on leave, to be out of the way, and Freeport too.' 'Freeport--what was Dick up to?'