Germans -- Travel -- England -- Kent -- Fiction; Humorous stories
My impulse was to ring the bell angrily, but it died away on my
recollecting that there was no bell. The rain, I could see, had now
lightened and thinned into a drizzle, and I could hear cheerful talk
going on between some persons evidently walking just outside. One voice
seemed to be Jellaby’s, but how could it be he who was cheerful after
the night he must have had? And the other was a woman’s--no doubt, I
thought bitterly, Edelgard’s, who, warmed herself and invigorated by a
proper morning meal, cared nothing that her husband should be lying
there within a stone’s throw like a cold, neglected tomb.
Presently, instead of the hedge, the walls and gates of gardens passed
the window, and then came houses, singly at first, but soon joining on
to each other in an uninterrupted string, and raising myself on my elbow
and putting two and two together, I decided that this must be Wadhurst.
It was. To my surprise about the middle of the village the caravan
stopped, and raising myself once more on my elbow I was forced
immediately to sink back again, for I encountered a row of eager faces
pressed against the pane with eyes rudely staring at the contents of the
caravan, which, of course, included myself as soon as I came into view
from between the curtains of the berth.
This was very disagreeable. Again I instinctively and frantically sought
the bell that was not there. How long was I to be left thus in the
street of a village with my window-curtains unclosed and the entire
population looking in? I could not get out and close them myself, for I
am staunch to the night attire, abruptly terminating, that is still,
thank heaven, characteristic during the hours of darkness of every
honest German gentleman: in other words, I do not dress myself, as the
English do, in a coat and trousers in order to go to bed. But on this
occasion I wished that I did, for then I could have leaped out of my
berth and drawn the curtains in an instant myself, and the German attire
allows no margin for the leaping out of berths. As it was, all I could
do was to lie there holding the berth-curtains carefully together until
such time as it should please my dear wife to honour me with a visit.
This she did after, I should say, at least half an hour had passed, with
the completely composed face of one who has no reproaches to make
herself, and a cup of weak tea in one hand and a small slice of dry
toast on a plate in the other, though she knows I never touch tea and
that it is absurd to offer a large-framed, fine man one piece of toast
with no butter on it for his breakfast.
“What are we stopping for?” I at once asked on her appearing.
“For breakfast,” said she.
“What?”
“We are having it in the inn to-day because of the wet. It is so nice,
Otto. Table-napkins and everything. And flowers in the middle. And
nothing to wash up afterward. What a pity you can’t be there! Are you
better?”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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