The Card, a Story of Adventure in the Five TownsBennett, Arnold
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The Card, a Story of Adventure in the Five Towns
Bennett, Arnold
Adventure stories; City and town life -- Fiction; Staffordshire (England) -- Fiction
The mule was a part of his more recent splendour. It was aged seven, and
it had cost Denry ten pounds. He had bought it off a farmer whose wife
"stood" St Luke's Market. His excuse was that he needed help in getting
about the Five Towns in pursuit of cottage rents, for his business of a
rent-collector had grown. But for this purpose a bicycle would have
served equally well, and would not have cost a shilling a day to feed,
as the mule did, nor have shied at policemen, as the mule nearly always
did. Denry had bought the mule simply because he had been struck all of
a sudden with the idea of buying the mule. Some time previously Jos
Curtenty (the Deputy-Mayor, who became Mayor of Bursley on the Earl of
Chell being called away to govern an Australian colony) had made an
enormous sensation by buying a flock of geese and driving them home
himself. Denry did not like this. He was indeed jealous, if a large mind
can be jealous. Jos Curtenty was old enough to be his grandfather, and
had been a recognised "card" and "character" since before Denry's birth.
But Denry, though so young, had made immense progress as a card, and
had, perhaps justifiably, come to consider himself as the premier card,
the very ace, of the town. He felt that some reply was needed to
Curtenty's geese, and the mule was his reply. It served excellently.
People were soon asking each other whether they had heard that Denry
Machin's "latest" was to buy a mule. He obtained a little old victoria
for another ten pounds, and a good set of harness for three guineas. The
carriage was low, which enabled him, as he said, to nip in and out much
more easily than in and out of a trap. In his business you did almost
nothing but nip in and out. On the front seat he caused to be fitted a
narrow box of japanned tin, with a formidable lock and slits on the top.
This box was understood to receive the rents, as he collected them. It
was always guarded on journeys by a cross between a mastiff and
something unknown, whose growl would have terrorised a lion-tamer. Denry
himself was afraid of Rajah, the dog, but he would not admit it. Rajah
slept in the stable behind Mrs Machin's cottage, for which Denry paid a
shilling a week. In the stable there was precisely room for Rajah, the
mule and the carriage, and when Denry entered to groom or to harness,
something had to go out.
The equipage quickly grew into a familiar sight in the streets of the
district. Denry said that it was funny without being vulgar. Certainly
it amounted to a continual advertisement for him; an infinitely more
effective advertisement than, for instance, a sandwichman at
eighteen-pence a day, and costing no more, even with the licence and the
shoeing. Moreover, a sandwichman has this inferiority to a turnout: when
you have done with him you cannot put him up to auction and sell him.
Further, there are no sandwichmen in the Five Towns; in that democratic
and independent neighbourhood nobody would deign to be a sandwichman.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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