He tried to think; but he could not think. His faculties were in a
whirl--he could by no means command them. He could only wait, inert,
while the dance went on. It was an extremely riotous dance. The
Duchessa's conversation was reproduced without sequence, without
coherence--scattered fragments of it were flashed before him fitfully,
in swift disorder. If he would attempt to seize upon one of those
fragments, to detain and fix it, for consideration--a speech of hers,
a look, an inflection--then the whole experience suddenly lost its
outlines, his recollection of it became a jumble, and he was left, as it
were, intellectually gasping.
He walked about his garden, he went into the house, he came out, he
walked about again, he went in and dressed for dinner, he sat on his
rustic bench, he smoked cigarette after cigarette.
“Ought I to have told her? Ought I to tell her to-morrow?”
At moments there would come a lull in the turmoil, an interval of quiet,
of apparent clearness; and the answer would seem perfectly plain.
“Of course, you ought to tell her. Tell her--and all will be well. She
has put herself in the supposititious woman's place, and she says, 'He
ought to tell her.' She says it earnestly, vehemently. That means that
if she were the woman, she would wish to be told. She will despise the
conventional barriers--she will be touched, she will be moved. 'No woman
could be proof against such a compliment.' Go to her to-morrow, and tell
her--and all will be well.”
At these moments he would look up towards the castle, and picture
the morrow's consummation; and his heart would have a convulsion.
Imagination flew on the wings of his desire. She stood before him in all
her sumptuous womanhood, tender and strong and glowing. As he spoke, her
eyes lightened, her eyes burned, the blood came and went in her cheeks;
her lips parted. Then she whispered something; and his heart leapt
terribly; and he called her name--“Beatrice! Beatrice!” Her name
expressed the inexpressible--the adoring passion, the wild hunger and
wild triumph of his soul. But now she was moving towards him--she was
holding out her hands. He caught her in his arms--he held her yielding
body in his arms. And his heart leapt terribly, terribly. And he
wondered how he could endure, how he could live through, the hateful
hours that must elapse before tomorrow would be to-day.
But “hearts, after leaps, ache.” Presently the whirl would begin again;
and then, by and by, in another lull, a contrary answer would seem
equally plain.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Elsewhere in the archive
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account