England -- Social life and customs -- 20th century -- Fiction; Love stories; Social classes -- England -- Fiction; Young women -- Fiction
His whole face lit up again--there was hope perhaps after all.
"Of course, darling--What else?"
"It is an insult--but I am not concerned with that point. My views are
perhaps not orthodox. I am merely interested in my side of the affair,
which is that I have not the slightest wish for the post. I will be no
man's mistress--do you hear?"
"Katherine, can I not make you love me, sweet?"
She laughed softly. It was a dangerous sound, ominous as that which a
lioness might make when she purrs.
"Not if you stayed on your knees for a thousand years! I have loved one
man in my life with the kind of love which you desire--I know exactly
what it means, and probably I shall never love another in that way--I
sacrificed him for my idea. I had will enough to leave him, feeling for
him what perhaps you feel for me. So do you think, then, that you could
move me in the least!--You whom I do not love, but--despise!"
All this time, she stood there utterly desirable in her thin raiment,
which she had never sought to cover. Indeed, now that she saw that she
was going to win the game, she took joy that he should understand what
he had lost, so that his punishment should be the more complete: there
was nothing pitiful or tender about Katherine Bush. Her strange, strong
character had no mercy for a man who had shown her that he was not
master of himself--above all things, she admired self-control.
Gerard Strobridge suffered, as she spoke, as perhaps he had never done
in his life before. If he had been one whit less of a gentleman, he
would not now have conquered himself; he would have seized her in his
arms, and made her pay for her scalding words. The effect of tradition
for centuries, however, held him even beyond the mad longing which again
thrilled through his blood as he looked at her.
He flung himself into the armchair and buried his head in his hands.
"My God!" he cried, hoarsely, "how you can torture--can you not? I knew
when I watched you in church that you could be cruel as the grave--but I
thought to-day when you looked at me there in my aunt's sitting-room,
that to me perhaps you meant to be kind; your face is the essence of
passion--it would deceive any man."
"Then it is well that you should be undeceived--and that we should
understand one another. What did you think you would gain by coming here
to-night?--My seduction? And some pleasure for yourself." She was
horribly scornful again. "You never thought of me--It does not matter
what my personal views are about such relations; you do not know them,
and I do not believe that I have given you reason to think that you
might treat me with want of respect; but your action shows that you do
not respect me, I can only presume, because of my dependent position,
and because you despise my class--since you would certainly not have
behaved so to any of your aunt's guests."
He writhed a little at her taunt, and his face was haggard now as he
looked up at her.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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