England -- Social life and customs -- 20th century -- Fiction; Love stories; Social classes -- England -- Fiction; Young women -- Fiction
indifference to her--and she would not for a moment have dreamed of any
obligation to reveal that episode in her past to him, since the
probabilities were so very remote that discovery could ever happen and
therefore her silence would in no way injure him. It would be merely a
bargain in which an old man bought a young woman "as she stood," so to
speak, for the pleasure of his eye.
But the Duke of Mordryn was different--between them there could be no
deceptions, no secrets, there must be none but the highest things, since
marriage with him would mean the union of their souls. Katherine was far
from being altruistic or sentimental, it was only the strictly common
sense and baldly honest aspect of any case that ever influenced her.
The temptation was overpowering, of course, to brush aside moral
qualms.--To think of reigning in this splendid place!--and she let her
imagination run on--To think of being with the Duke always--his loved
companion. The joy to make him very happy, and do everything he wished.
What pains she would take to fulfil his highest ideal of her--to show to
his world that whatever she had sprung from, at least she carried off
the situation of Duchess in a manner in which they could find no flaw.
She would be gracious and sweet and dignified and capable. She would
bring all her reasoning to bear upon all problems. She would let him
guide and direct her, and she would carry out his least behest.
_But it could not be._ She had made an initial mistake and
miscalculation in her career through ignorance of possible results, and
she could never shuffle out of it. Self-deception was of all mental
attitudes the one she despised the most. She must face the consequence
of her mistake now with courage, and take the second best.
Having once made up her mind in the early dawn, it was not in her nature
to indulge in further repining. She as resolutely shut out the image of
the Duke and the picture of happiness with him, as she had shut out Lord
Algy. Only this time the pain was infinitely more bitter, because she
knew that she was obliged to refrain from sipping this glorious cup
_because of her own miscalculation_. Whereas when she parted from Lord
Algy she had had the moral elation of knowing that she was doing rather
a fine thing.
Extreme pallor showed in her face in the morning, and her great eyes
were shadowed and sad. She remained in the ante-chamber at the
writing-table which had been prepared for her, after she had breakfasted
with Lady Garribardine in her sitting-room. Numbers of letters had come
by the Sunday's post, and she made it seem necessary to answer them at
once.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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