I stared, astounded, while she, watching me closely with veiled, sidling
eyes, caught the wild desire of my glance and, shaking her head,
murmured dreamily: “In this wondrous world of fancy crowded with vain
longings and godly phantoms which dart from rainbow film, then flash
onward, your image does not blend. This sphere is the space of centuries
which separates us and, though creating the new element, your appeal
fails to inspire response. The joining of two such natures shatters the
beautiful—we are not mates. Yours is the love that hopes, dreads, doubts
and fears, and dies with possession; while I seek, yet devoutly hope
never to find the one only charm of my visionary world—a powerful
influence which vanquishes denial, curbing destiny with compelling,
flaming radiance—a mighty glory never realized, yet swaying the universe
with longings reaching above and far beyond that monster called Death.
Ah, Virgillius,” she whispered tremulously, “I can love; yes, I can
love; but with the knowledge happiness departs forever.”
Rapturously I caught her hand, exultant; aflame at her confession I
dared press my hot lips to her soft, fair neck. She shuddered, then
gently drew from my embrace.
“Thus are the dead evils of the ancients easily acquired,” she murmured
gloomily, chilling my ardor and thrusting me and my passion to musty
remoteness.
“And, Virgillius,” she continued, “after centuries of training the
savage is still untamed. Leave me now, I am wearied, and the day
approaches.”
She rose languidly, moving to the window. In the dull gray light of dawn
she looked wan, strangely pathetic. In tenderest sympathy I hastened to
her side, for the second half regretting my work which had robbed her
forever of contentment. The ideal, always existing in her brain, had
formed distinct, existable, and she worshipped every caprice of
imagination.
Kindly she smiled dismissal, pointing to the heavens flushed with the
new day. I understood and, raising her hand to my lips, silently
departed. Out of her presence regrets vanished. I had commenced well and
accomplished more in a few hours than I had expected to in weeks. Women
always adore the ideal, and love a man.
This strange, fascinating piece of femininity grieved because realizing
she was a woman, an adorable woman, not a saint.
Alpha Centauri is mine!
CHAPTER XIV.
The scorching rays of an afternoon sun roused me from a sleep of hours,
yet dreamily I rested till a subdued murmur reached me from the outer
room and I knew my friends had returned.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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