Clergy -- England -- Fiction; England -- Social life and customs -- Fiction; Families -- England -- Fiction
He had been very restless, attempting again and again to sit up in bed,
and it had needed not only all her care but all her strength to keep him
lying down. All night long, too, that terrible uncontrollable twitching
of the muscles of leg and arm had gone on incessantly, and again and
again, for ten minutes or more at a stretch, she had kept one arm with
steady pressure over those poor, jumping knees, while she held the other
ready to prevent his getting up. It had been all she could do, in fact,
to manage him alone, but she had been unwilling, except at the last
extremity, to rouse Nurse James from the next room, for she had had a
terribly tiring day yesterday with him. Yesterday, too, a second doctor
had come down from London. The case was extremely grave, but all that
could be done was being done.
Martin was lying rather more quiet just now, and Nurse Baker had moved
from the bed to put out the lamp and draw the blind up a little. His
eyes were wide open, staring at the ceiling, and he was talking in a
high, meaningless drone.
“No, Karl, I can’t do it” he was saying. “I don’t see it like that. I
know I shall break down, because I haven’t the slightest idea of how it
begins, and I can’t leave out the beginning. And father is angry with
me, and when he is angry he frightens me. Hasn’t Stella come to see me?
I had such a headache, you know; like a great piece of hot iron, you
know, right inside my head. They took off the top of my head to put it
there. I’m frightened of him when he’s like that. Where’s Stella? No;
Lady Sunningdale was in the bird of para--para--parachute--I don’t know,
in that hat anyhow, you fool with Sahara. That’s what made it so hot,
and I can’t endure English chants. Oh, father, don’t, don’t. It isn’t my
fault.”
His voice rose to a scream, and the nurse came quickly back to the
bedside, just in time to prevent him rising.
The door opened gently, and Helen came in in her dressing-gown. And the
terrible drone began again.
“And when we’re married, Helen and Frank shall come and stay with us,
and I’ll play to them, if it gets cooler. But father mustn’t know; he
mustn’t come. Karl is the loud pedal you see, and the music-stool, and
I’m only the black notes. I hope they won’t play me much, as I’m all out
of tune with the iron. And all those faces are there, a sea of them, and
I’m all alone. If I break down father will be angry!”
He turned his head sideways on the pillow, closed his eyes, and was
silent for a little. Helen, with quivering lip, was looking at that dear
face, so thin and hollow, so untidy and unshaven, with unspeakable love
and longing. Then the nurse left the bed and came to her. Helen did not
ask if he was better.
“Can I help you in anything?” she said.
“No, dear Miss Helen, thank you. I think he will be quieter for a little
now. But I should like Dr. Thaxter to be sent for at once, please. Yes,
he is very ill. He is as ill as he can be. There, there, my dear!”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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