"Pardon me," she said hastily, "if I must decline under any
circumstances, to take part in what is called divine service. My
reasons for so doing I may be permitted to keep to myself. I doubt
whether they would be understood, far less appreciated by you, and I am
not accustomed to be faithless to my convictions, even for the large
fee you intimate I should receive."
"Your reasons?" he said smiling, as he rose and approached her. "Will
you permit me to read these reasons, or rather this one motive from
your brow?"
"Sir--"
She looked at him in astonishment and retreated a step, as if to
protect her personal freedom. He stood still and again gazed steadily
at the ceiling.
"The one reason that you will take no part in any religious service,
is: that you have no God whom you desire to serve," he said in the
frankest possible tone, as if he were speaking of something that was
quite a matter of course.
She did not answer immediately. The man's amazing assurance seemed to
intimidate her. She was forced to arm herself with her old defiance ere
she could reply.
"Did you really read it from my brow, or only in the book on the
table?"
"My dear Fräulein," he answered kindly, "if I had had the honor of a
longer acquaintance with you, you would expect me to be able to solve
so easy an enigma without such aid. The author of that book, believe
me, with all his atheism, knew more of God than you do--at least at
this time, for he knew that which alone leads to Him, and which so far
as I see, has hitherto remained unknown to you, and therefore renders
the natural estrangement from God you share with countless others, so
harsh and apparently necessary: _sin_. You need not answer yes or no.
I'm sure of it: whatever errors and weaknesses have entered your life,
you have never known sin, _that_ sin which alone arouses in the wilful
heart the need, the longing for redemption, the burning sense of our
own weakness and baseness, which makes us thirst for God and is at last
stilled by the dew of mercy. Do you smile, Fräulein? This language
seems to exaggerated to express the naked truth. Some day you will
remember it, and no longer smile.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Elsewhere in the archive
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account