There's Ossulston, gallant as high, Gaffer Grey, Can prove his descent--without flaw. "He was named for a stick, 'Twas a sad scurvy trick, For he look'd like--a Frog with a Straw! Well-a-day!" Your chance is but bad, I confess, Gaffer Grey, But freedom may still be your butt. "Talk of freedom--my eye! If in the State Pie I could get but a finger, I'd cut,-- Happy day!" The times are not yet come to that, Gaffer Grey. What then?--"Whilst there's life there is hope: Though John Bull turns his back On the talented Pack, You may still get Pat Bull from the Pope By your play!" THE IDLE APPRENTICE TURNED INFORMER. A NEW BALLAD, BY T. C., ESQ.[24] _Tune_--"When I was Maid, oh then, oh then!" I once was a placeman, but then, but then, I once was a placeman, but then 'Twas in the pure day Of Lansdowne and Grey, And the rest of the talented men--men! And the rest of the talented men! I had been a lawyer, but then, but then, I had been a lawyer, but then I hated the fag Of the wig and the bag, And envied the Parliament men--men, And envied the Parliament men. So I married a widow, and then, and then, So I married a window, and then Folks wonder'd to see That a woman could be So fond of a face like a wen--wen, So fond of a face like a wen. But she had a borough, and then, and then, She had a borough, and then, By the help of the dame, I got into the same, But never could do it again--again, Never could do it again. So I found out another, and then, and then, So I found out another, and then The worthy Lord Thanet, He chose me to man it, As free----as a sheep in a pen--pen! As free as a sheep in a pen! At last we got power, and then, and then, At last we got power, and then A salary clean Of hundreds fifteen, Made me the most happy of men--men, Made me the most happy of men. The first quarter-day came, and then, and then, The first quarter-day came, and then I reckon'd my score, But I never did more Till quarter-day came round again--'gain, Till quarter-day came round again. Despatches came sometimes, but then, but then, Despatches came sometimes, but then I handed them slyly To Morpeth or Hiley, And limp'd back to Brookes's again--'gain, And limp'd back to Brookes's again. If Ossulston call'd on me, then, oh then, If Ossulston call'd on me then, We stroll'd through the Park, And the folks would remark, We look'd like an owl and a wren--wren, We look'd like an owl and a wren.