Chouans -- Fiction; French fiction -- Translations into English
which considerably reduced the fortune of my brother, his legitimate
son. I found myself one day without a home and without a protector. My
brother contested the will which made me rich. Three years of my late
life had developed my vanity. By satisfying all my fancies my father
had created in my nature a need of luxury, and given me habits of
self-indulgence of which my own mind, young and artless as it then was,
could not perceive either the danger or the tyranny. A friend of my
father, the Marechal Duc de Lenoncourt, then seventy years old, offered
to become my guardian, and I found myself, soon after the termination of
the odious suit, in a brilliant home, where I enjoyed all the advantages
of which my brother’s cruelty had deprived me. Every evening the old
marechal came to sit with me and comfort me with kind and consoling
words. His white hair and the many proofs he gave me of paternal
tenderness led me to turn all the feelings of my heart upon him, and
I felt myself his daughter. I accepted his presents, hiding none of my
caprices from him, for I saw how he loved to gratify them. I heard one
fatal evening that all Paris believed me the mistress of the poor old
man. I was told that it was then beyond my power to recover an innocence
thus gratuitously denied me. They said that the man who had abused my
inexperience could not be lover, and would not be my husband. The week
in which I made this horrible discovery the duke left Paris. I was
shamefully ejected from the house where he had placed me, and which did
not belong to him. Up to this point I have told you the truth as though
I stood before God; but now, do not ask a wretched woman to give account
of sufferings which are buried in her heart. The time came when I found
myself married to Danton. A few days later the storm uprooted the mighty
oak around which I had thrown my arms. Again I was plunged into the
worst distress, and I resolved to kill myself. I don’t know whether
love of life, or the hope of wearying ill-fortune and of finding at
the bottom of the abyss the happiness which had always escaped me were,
unconsciously to myself, my advisers, or whether I was fascinated by the
arguments of a young man from Vendome, who, for the last two years, has
wound himself about me like a serpent round a tree,--in short, I know
not how it is that I accepted, for a payment of three hundred thousand
francs, the odious mission of making an unknown man fall in love with
me and then betraying him. I met you; I knew you at once by one of
those presentiments which never mislead us; yet I tried to doubt my
recognition, for the more I came to love you, the more the certainty
appalled me. When I saved you from the hands of Hulot, I abjured the
part I had taken; I resolved to betray the slaughterers, and not
their victim. I did wrong to play with men, with their lives, their
principles, with myself, like a thoughtless girl who sees only
sentiments in this life.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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