All these anxieties, and, if I may be permitted, without disrespect to
the dead, to add, all this twaddle, that accompanied them, were shortly
suspended by an incident that struck nearer home; made Tergou furiously
jealous of Catherine, and Catherine weep. And, if my reader is fond of
wasting his time, as some novel readers are, he cannot do it more
effectually than by guessing what could produce results so incongruous.
Marched up to Eli's door a pageant brave to the eye of sense, and to the
vulgar judgment noble, but, to the philosophic, pitiable more or less.
It looked one animal, a centaur: but on severe analysis proved two. The
human half was sadly bedizened with those two metals, to clothe his
carcass with which and line his pouch, man has now and then disposed of
his soul: still the horse was the vainer brute of the two; he was far
worse beflounced, bebonneted, and bemantled, than any fair lady regnante
crinolinâ. For the man, under the colour of a warming-pan, retained
Nature's outline. But it was "subaudi equum!" Scarce a pennyweight of
honest horseflesh to be seen. Our crinoline spares the noble parts of
woman, and makes but the baser parts gigantic (why this preference?):
but this poor animal from stem to stern was swamped in finery. His ears
were hid in great sheaths of white linen tipped with silver and blue.
His body swaddled in stiff gorgeous cloths descending to the ground,
except just in front, where they left him room to mince. His tail,
though dear to memory, no doubt, was lost to sight, being tucked in
heaven knows how. Only his eyes shone out like goggles, through two
holes pierced in the wall of haberdashery, and his little front hoofs
peeped in and out like rats.
Yet did this compound, gorgeous and irrational, represent power;
absolute power: it came straight from a tournament at the duke's court,
which being on a progress, lay last night at a neighboring town--to
execute the behests of royalty.
"What ho!" cried the upper half, and on Eli emerging, with his wife
behind him, saluted them. "Peace be with you, good people. Rejoice! I am
come for your dwarf."
Eli looked amazed, and said nothing. But Catherine screamed over his
shoulder, "You have mistook your road, good man; here abides no dwarf."
"Nay, wife, he means our Giles, who is somewhat small of stature: why
gainsay what gainsayed may not be?"
"Ay!" cried the pageant, "that is he, and discourseth like the big
tabor."
"His breast is sound for that matter," said Catherine, sharply.
"And prompt with his fists though at long odds."
"Else how would the poor thing keep his head in such a world as this?"
"'Tis well said, dame. Art as ready with thy weapon as he; art his
mother, likely. So bring him forth and that presently. See, they lead a
stunted mule for him. The duke hath need of him; sore need; we are clean
out o' dwarven; and tigercats; which may not be, whiles earth them
yieldeth. Our last hop o' my thumb tumbled down the well t'other day."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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