The Collected Works of Ambrose Bierce, Volume 08: Negligible Tales, On With the Dance, EpigramsBierce, Ambrose
General
The Collected Works of Ambrose Bierce, Volume 08: Negligible Tales, On With the Dance, Epigrams
Bierce, Ambrose
American literature
Having now got the ship's literature off his mind into ours, the captain
went on deck for the first time since leaving port. We were still
steering the same course, and, taking his first observation of the sun,
the captain discovered that we were in latitude 83° south. The heat was
insufferable; the air was like the breath of a furnace within a furnace.
The sea steamed like a boiling cauldron, and in the vapor our bodies
were temptingly parboiled--our ultimate meal was preparing. Warped by
the sun, the ship held both ends high out of the water; the deck of the
forecastle was an inclined plane, on which the bullock labored at a
disadvantage; but the bowsprit was now vertical and the Dutchman's
tenure precarious. A thermometer hung against the mainmast, and we
grouped ourselves about it as the captain went up to examine the
register.
"One hundred and ninety degrees Fahrenheit!" he muttered in evident
astonishment. "Impossible!" Turning sharply about, he ran his eyes over
us, and inquired in a peremptory tone, "who's been in command while I
was runnin' my eye over that book?"
"Well, captain," I replied, as respectfully as I knew how, "the fourth
day out I had the unhappiness to be drawn into a dispute about a game of
cards with your first and second officers. In the absence of those
excellent seamen, sir, I thought it my duty to assume control of the
ship."
"Killed 'em, hey?"
"Sir, they committed suicide by questioning the efficacy of four kings
and an ace."
"Well, you lubber, what have you to say in defense of this extraordinary
weather?"
"Sir, it is no fault of mine. We are far--very far south, and it is now
the middle of July. The weather is uncomfortable, I admit; but
considering the latitude and season, it is not, I protest,
unseasonable."
"Latitude and season!" he shrieked, livid with rage--"latitude and
season! Why, you junk-rigged, flat-bottomed, meadow lugger, don't you
know any better than that? Didn't yer little baby brother ever tell ye
that southern latitudes is colder than northern, and that July is the
middle o' winter here? Go below, you son of a scullion, or I'll break
your bones!"
"Oh! very well," I replied; "I'm not going to stay on deck and listen to
such low language as that, I warn you. Have it your own way."
The words had no sooner left my lips, than a piercing cold wind caused
me to cast my eye upon the thermometer. In the new régime of science the
mercury was descending rapidly; but in a moment the instrument was
obscured by a blinding fall of snow. Towering icebergs rose from the
water on every side, hanging their jagged masses hundreds of feet above
the masthead, and shutting us completely in. The ship twisted and
writhed; her decks bulged upward, and every timber groaned and cracked
like the report of a pistol. The _Camel_ was frozen fast. The jerk of
her sudden stopping snapped the bullock's chain, and sent both that
animal and the Dutchman over the bows, to accomplish their warfare on
the ice.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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