The Collected Works of Ambrose Bierce, Volume 11: AntepenultimataBierce, Ambrose
General
The Collected Works of Ambrose Bierce, Volume 11: Antepenultimata
Bierce, Ambrose
American essays; American literature
In his blind and brutal scramble for social recognition in Europe, the
traveling American toady and impostor has many chances of success: he
is commonly unknown even to ministers and consuls of his own country,
and these complaisant gentlemen, rather than incur the risk of erring
on the wrong side, take him at his own valuation and push him in
where, his obscurity being again in his favor, he is treated with
kindly toleration and sometimes a genuine hospitality to which he has
no shadow of right nor title, and which, if he were a gentleman, he
would not accept if it were voluntarily proffered. It should be said in
mitigation that all this delirious abasement in no degree tempers his
rancor against the system of which the foreign notable is the flower
and fruit. He keeps his servility sweet by preserving it in the salt of
vilification. In the character of blatant blackguard the American snob
is so happily disguised that he does not know himself.
An American newspaper once printed a portrait of her whom the
irreverent Briton had a reprehensible habit of designating colloquially
as “The Old Lady.” But the editor in question did not so designate
her—his simple American manhood and republican spirit would not admit
that she was a lady. So he contented himself with labeling the portrait
“Her Most Gracious Majesty Queen Victoria.” This incident raises an
important question.
Important Question Raised by This Incident: Is it better to be a
subject and a man, or a citizen and a flunkey?—to own the sway of a
“gory tyrant” and retain one’s self-respect, or dwell, a “sovereign
elector,” in the land of liberty and disgrace it?
However it may be customary for English newspapers to designate the
British sovereign, they are at least not addicted to sycophancy in
designating the rulers of other countries than their own. They would
not say “his Abracadabral Humptidumptiness Emperor William,” nor “his
Pestilency the Speaker of the American House of Representatives.”
They would not think of calling even the most ornately self-bemedaled
American sovereign elector “his Badgesty.” Of a foreign nobleman they
do not say “his lordship;” they will not admit that he is a lord;
nor when speaking of their own noblemen do they spell “lord” with a
capital L, as we do. In brief, when mentioning foreign dignitaries,
of whatever rank in their own countries, the English press is simply
and serviceably descriptive: the king is a king, the queen a queen, the
jack a jack.
At the foundation of our political system lies the denial of hereditary
and artificial rank. Our fathers created this government as a protest
against all that, and all that it implies. They virtually declared that
kings and noblemen could not breathe here, and no American loyal to the
principles of the Revolution which made him one will ever say in his
own country “your majesty” or “your lordship”—the words would choke
him, and they ought.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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