The Collected Works of Ambrose Bierce, Volume 12: In MotleyBierce, Ambrose
General
The Collected Works of Ambrose Bierce, Volume 12: In Motley
Bierce, Ambrose
American literature
At the close of the memorable decade (_circa_ “1919”) authentic history
again appears in the fragmentary work of Antrolius: Rosenfelt walks
out of the jungle at Mbongwa on the side of the continent opposite
Bumbassa. He is now attended by a caravan of twenty thousand camels
and ten thousand native porters, all bearing trophies of the chase.
A complete list of these would require more pages than Homer Wheeler
Wilcox’s catalogue of ships, but among them were heads of elephants
with antlers attached; pelts of the checkered lion and the spiny
hippopotentot, respectively the most ferocious and the most venomous
of their species; a skeleton of the missing lynx (_Pithecanthropos
erectus compilatus_); entire bodies of pterodactyls and broncosauruses;
a slithy tove mounted on a fine specimen of the weeping wanderoo; the
downy electrical whacknasty (_Ananias flabbergastor_); the carnivorous
mastodon; ten specimens of the skinless tiger (_Felis decorticata_);
a saber-toothed python, whose bite produced the weeping sickness;
three ribnosed gazzadoodles; a pair of blood-sweating bandicoots; a
night-blooming jeewhillikins; three and a half varieties of the crested
skynoceros; a purring crocodile, or buzz-saurian; two Stymphalian
linnets; a skeleton of the three footed swammigolsis—afterwards
catalogued at the Podunk Museum of Defective Types as _Talpa unopede
noninvento_; a hydra from Lerna; the ring-tail mollycoddle and the
fawning polecat (_Civis nondesiderabilis_).
These terrible monsters, which from the dawning of time had ravaged
all Africa, baffling every attempt at exploration and settlement,
the Exterminator, as he came to be called, had strangled or captured
with his bare hands; and the few remaining were so cowed that they
gave milk. Indeed, such was their terror of his red right arm that
all forsook their evil ways, offered themselves as beasts of burden
to the whites that came afterward, and in domestication and servitude
sought the security that he denied to their ferocity and power. Within
a single generation prosperous colonies of Caucasians sprang up all
along the coasts, and the silk hat and pink shirt, immemorial pioneers
and promoters of civilization, penetrated the remotest fastnesses,
spreading peace and plenty o’er a smiling land!
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Elsewhere in the archive
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account