The Comedies of William Congreve: Volume 1 [of 2]Congreve, William
General
The Comedies of William Congreve: Volume 1 [of 2]
Congreve, William
Comedy plays
ACT III.
SCENE I.
LORD TOUCHWOOD _and_ LADY TOUCHWOOD.
LADY TOUCH. My lord, can you blame my brother Plyant if he refuse his
daughter upon this provocation? The contract's void by this unheard-of
impiety.
LORD TOUCH. I don't believe it true; he has better principles. Pho,
'tis nonsense. Come, come, I know my Lady Plyant has a large eye, and
would centre everything in her own circle; 'tis not the first time she
has mistaken respect for love, and made Sir Paul jealous of the civility
of an undesigning person, the better to bespeak his security in her
unfeigned pleasures.
LADY TOUCH. You censure hardly, my lord; my sister's honour is very well
known.
LORD TOUCH. Yes, I believe I know some that have been familiarly
acquainted with it. This is a little trick wrought by some pitiful
contriver, envious of my nephew's merit.
LADY TOUCH. Nay, my lord, it may be so, and I hope it will be found so.
But that will require some time; for in such a case as this,
demonstration is necessary.
LORD TOUCH. There should have been demonstration of the contrary too,
before it had been believed.
LADY TOUCH. So I suppose there was.
LORD TOUCH. How? Where? When?
LADY TOUCH. That I can't tell; nay, I don't say there was. I am willing
to believe as favourably of my nephew as I can.
LORD TOUCH. I don't know that. [_Half aside_.]
LADY TOUCH. How? Don't you believe that, say you, my lord?
LORD TOUCH. No, I don't say so. I confess I am troubled to find you so
cold in his defence.
LADY TOUCH. His defence! Bless me, would you have me defend an ill
thing?
LORD TOUCH. You believe it, then?
LADY TOUCH. I don't know; I am very unwilling to speak my thoughts in
anything that may be to my cousin's disadvantage: besides, I find, my
lord, you are prepared to receive an ill impression from any opinion of
mine which is not consenting with your own. But, since I am like to be
suspected in the end, and 'tis a pain any longer to dissemble, I own it
to you; in short I do believe it, nay, and can believe anything worse, if
it were laid to his charge. Don't ask me my reasons, my lord, for they
are not fit to be told you.
LORD TOUCH. I'm amazed: there must be something more than ordinary in
this. [_Aside_.] Not fit to be told me, madam? You can have no
interests wherein I am not concerned, and consequently the same reasons
ought to be convincing to me, which create your satisfaction or disquiet.
LADY TOUCH. But those which cause my disquiet I am willing to have
remote from your hearing. Good my lord, don't press me.
LORD TOUCH. Don't oblige me to press you.
LADY TOUCH. Whatever it was, 'tis past. And that is better to be
unknown which cannot be prevented; therefore let me beg you to rest
satisfied.
LORD TOUCH. When you have told me, I will.
LADY TOUCH. You won't.
LORD TOUCH. By my life, my dear, I will.
LADY TOUCH. What if you can't?
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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