Sir Andrew Agnew, oh! thou scourge of sinners, Thou legislator against vice And nice Hot Sunday dinners! What shall we do Now thou art gone—thou and Sir Oswald[3] too— To make men fast and pray Each seventh day? Who now shall save us from sin's burning embers? Now that we've lost our two old _Marrowbone_ members? But seriously, Sir Andrew, do you think There's so much harm in meat and drink? That a hot steak Ate once a week Shows a depraved state of society? That frizzled bacon Argues a soul mistaken? And—pray don't start!— That devil'd kidneys show a dev'lish heart? That there is irreligion in hot fry? And that cold pie alone is pie-ty? If so, begin, Sir, with the rich: ask these To give up their ragouts, and stews, and fricassees. I guess they'd think your application rather strange; But if you _will_ work out your Bill, Believe me, you must take a wider kitchen range. Then, Sir, you think it wrong In 'bus or cab to ride along The streets, Intent on rural treats At Hampstead, Islington, or Turnham Green; But have you never seen The crowd Of knights and dames, on palfreys fierce and proud, That fill Hyde Park o' Sundays? I don't wish to tease, But, Sir, for riders such as these, There ought, I think, to be a rider to your Bill. No doubt it's very wrong, and shows but little _nous_, To go a tea-drinking, and making merry At th' _Eagle_, _Rosemary Branch_, or _Yorkshire Stingo_;— _Chalk Farm's_ as vile, by jingo! There's something very black about _White Conduit House_. Richmond is sad; And Twickenham's as bad: And Hampton Wick is very wicked—very. But, Sir,—excuse the freedom of my pen— D'ye think that they Who spend the day At Tattersall's, in laying wagers On Derbys, Oaks, and Legers, Are _better_ men? And then, the Clubs!—where gambling of all kinds, And vices such as daylight never saw, Are carried on behind cast-metal blinds— For these, Sir, can't you frame some new Club Law? Then, Sir, I know You vote rat-killing low; And wouldn't sit For worlds in the Westminster Pit. And so no doubt it is—extremely shocking; But so is cocking! And I have known full many a _noble_ lord (I have, upon my word,) Fight cocks upon this day: So pray,