The Comic Almanack, Volume 1: An Ephemeris in Jest and Earnest, Containing Merry Tales, Humerous Poetry, Quips, and OdditiesThackeray, William Makepeace
Philosophy
The Comic Almanack, Volume 1: An Ephemeris in Jest and Earnest, Containing Merry Tales, Humerous Poetry, Quips, and Oddities
Thackeray, William Makepeace
Almanacs, English -- England -- London; English wit and humor
The opera is bad enough; but what is that to the bally? You _should_
have seen my Jemmy the first night when she stopped to see it; and when
Madamsalls Fanny and Theresa Hustler came forward, along with a
gentleman, to dance, you should have seen how Jemmy stared, and our girl
blushed, when Madamsall Fanny, coming forward, stood on the tips of only
five of her toes, and raising up the other five, and the foot belonging
to them, almost to her shoulder, twirled round, and round, and round,
like a teetotum, for a couple of minutes or more; and as she settled
down, at last, on both feet, in a natural decent posture, you should
have heard how the house roared with applause, the boxes clapping with
all their might, and waving their handkerchiefs; the pit shouting,
"Bravo!" Some people, who, I suppose, were rather angry at such an
exhibition, threw bunches of flowers at her; and what do you think she
did? why, hang me, if she did not come forward, as though nothing had
happened, gather up the things they had thrown at her, smile, press them
to her heart, and began whirling round again, faster than ever!—Talk
about coolness, _I_ never saw such in all _my_ born days.
"Nasty thing!" says Jemmy, starting up in a fury; "if women _will_ act
so, it serves them right to be treated so."
"O, yes! she acts beautifully," says our friend, his Excellency, who,
along with Baron von Punter, and Tagrag, used very seldom to miss coming
to our box.
"She may act very beautifully, Munseer, but she don't dress so; and I am
very glad they threw that orange-peel and all those things at her, and
that the people waved to her to get off."
Here his Excellency, and the Baron, and Tag, set up a roar of laughter.
"My dear Mrs. Coxe," says Tag, "those are the most famous dancers in the
world; and we throw myrtle, geraniums, and lilies, and roses, at them,
in token of our immense admiration!"
"Well, I never!" said my wife; and poor Jemimarann slunk behind the
curtain, and looked as red as it almost. After the one had done, the
next begun; but when, all of a sudden, a somebody came skipping and
bounding in, like an Indian-rubber ball, flinging itself up at least six
feet from the stage, and there shaking about its legs like mad, we were
more astonished than ever!
"That's Anatole," says one of the gentlemen.
"Anna who?" says my wife, and she might well be mistaken; for this
person had a hat and feathers, a bare neck and arms, great black
ringlets, and a little calico frock, which came down to the knees.
"Anatole; you would not think he was sixty-three years old, he's as
active as a man of twenty."
"_He!_" shrieked out my wife; "what, is that there a man? For shame!
Munseer. Jemimarann, dear, get your cloak, and come along; and I'll
thank you, my dear, to call our people and let us go home."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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