The Comic History of EnglandÀ Beckett, Gilbert Abbott
History
The Comic History of England
À Beckett, Gilbert Abbott
Great Britain -- History -- Humor
The Normans added little to the stock of English furniture, for we
have looked through our statistical tables and find nothing that would
furnish an extra leaf to our history. It is, however, about this time
that we find the first instance of a cradle made to rock, an arrangement
founded on the deepest philosophy; for by the rocking movement the
infant is prepared for the ups and downs of life he will soon have to
bear up against.
The reign of John introduces us to the first saltcellar on record,
though, by the way, the first vinegar cruet is of even earlier date, for
it is contemporary with the sour-tempered Eleanor, who is reported to
have played a fearful game at bowls with the unfortunate Rosamond.
When Fashion first came to prevail in dress, Taste had not yet arrived,
and the effect was truly ridiculous. It does not follow, however, that
if Fashion and Taste had existed together, they would have managed to
agree; for although there is often a happy union between the two, they
very frequently remain at variance for considerable periods. Fashion
being the stronger, usually obtains the ascendency in the first
instance; but Taste ultimately prevails over her wayward rival.
In nothing so much as in shoes, have the freaks of Fashion been
exemplified. She has often taken the feet in hand, and in a double sense
subjugated the understanding of her votaries. In the days of Henry the
First shoes were worn in a long peak, or curling like a ram's horn,
and stuffed with tow, as if the natural too was not sufficient for
all reasonable purposes. The rage for long hair was so excessive that
councils * were held on the subject, and the state of the crops was
considered with much anxiety. The clergy produced scissors at the end of
the service to cut the hair of the congregation; and it is said of Serlo
d'Abon, the Bishop of Seez, that he, on Easter Day, 1105, cut every one
of the locks off Henry the First's knowledge-box.
* At Limoges, in 1031, by Pope Gregory the Seventh in 1073,
and at Rouen in 1095,
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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