The Comic History of EnglandÀ Beckett, Gilbert Abbott
History
The Comic History of England
À Beckett, Gilbert Abbott
Great Britain -- History -- Humor
His fleet consisted of more than a thousand vessels, and some swans
having come to look at it, he declared this little mark of cygnal
attention to be a capital omen. We must request the reader to bear
in mind, that though all the authorities justify us in announcing one
thousand as the number of the ships constituting Henry's fleet, we
should not advise anyone to believe the statement, who has not had an
opportunity of counting the vessels. Either the ships in those days were
very small, or Southampton harbour has been fearfully contracted by
the contractors who have since undertaken to widen it. We have been
accustomed to place implicit faith in the rule of arithmetic, that
"a thousand into one won't go!" nor do we feel disposed to alter our
impression in favour of a thousand of Henry's ships being able to go
into Southampton harbour. We suspect that a hundred would have been
nearer the mark, for posterity is greatly in the habit of putting on an
O, and really believing there is nothing in it.
Whatever the numerical strength of Henry's fleet may have been, it is
certain that he entered the mouth of the Seine, which made no attempt
to show its teeth, and he landed on the 13th of August, three miles from
Harfleur, without any resistance. He severely deprecated all excesses
against the peaceful inhabitants, but he nevertheless besieged the
fortress of Harfleur with tremendous energy; so that his conduct towards
the natives was a good deal like that of the individual who knocked
another downstairs with numerous apologies for being under the painful
necessity of doing so.
The siege was under the conduct of "Master Giles," the Wellington of the
period. Master Giles must have been somewhat of a bungler, for he
was not successful until he had lost nearly all his men, and been
six-and-thirty days routing out the garrison. Even then the foe
surrendered through being too ill to fight, rather than from having
got much the worst of it. Henry's army was also reduced to a pack of
invalids, and his ships were turned into infirmaries for his soldiers.
Though the troops were wretchedly indisposed, Henry himself was only
sick of doing nothing, and he accordingly sent a challenge by a friend
to the dauphin of France, inviting him to a single combat.
The feelings of Louis were not in correspondence with those of the
English king, whose invitation to a hostile _tête-d-téte_ was never
answered. The friend sent by Henry was not by any means the sort of
person to tempt the representative of Young France to a hostile meeting.
[Illustration: 265]
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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