The Comic History of EnglandÀ Beckett, Gilbert Abbott
History
The Comic History of England
À Beckett, Gilbert Abbott
Great Britain -- History -- Humor
When William received the news of Harold's accession he was having
a game with a bow and arrows in his hunting-ground near Rouen. His
trembling knees suddenly took the form of his bow, and his lip began to
quiver. He threw himself hastily into a skiff, and crossing the Seine,
never stopped till he reached his palace, where he walked up and down
the hall several times, occasionally sitting down for a moment in the
porter's chair, then starting up and resuming his promenade up and
down the passage. On recovering from his reverie he sent ambassadors
to demand of Harold the fulfilment of his promise; but that dishonest
person replied, that he being under duress when he gave his word, it
could not be considered binding.
[Illustration: 078]
William accordingly called a public meeting of Normans, at which it
was resolved unanimously, that England should be invaded as speedily
as possible. A subscription was immediately entered into to defray the
cost, and volunteers were admitted to join the expedition without the
formality of a reference. Tag from Maine ana Anjou, Rag from Poitou and
Bretagne, with Bob-tail from Flanders, came rapidly pouring in; while
the riff of the Rhine, and the raff of the Alps, formed altogether a mob
of the most miscellaneous character. Those families who are in the
habit of boasting that their ancestors came in with the Conqueror,
would scarcely feel so proud of the fact if they were aware that the
companions of William comprised nearly all the roguery and vagabondism
of Europe.
A large fleet having been for some time in readiness at St. Valery, near
Dieppe, crossed in the autumn of 1066, and on the 28th of September the
Normans landed without opposition at Pevensey, near Hastings. William,
who was the last to step on shore, fell flat upon his hands and face,
which was at first considered by the soldiers as an evil omen; but
opening his palm, which was covered with mud, he gaily exclaimed, "Thus
do I lay my hands upon this ground--and be assured that it is a pie you
shall all have a finger in." This speech, or words to the same effect,
restored the confidence of the soldiers, and they marched to Hastings,
where they waited the coming of the enemy.
[Illustration: 081]
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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