The comic history of the United States, from a period prior to the discovery of America to times long subsequent to the presentSherwood, John D.
History
The comic history of the United States, from a period prior to the discovery of America to times long subsequent to the present
Sherwood, John D.
United States -- History -- Humor
Marie, and there established the first white settlement in the
present State of Michigan, set out, with Joliet and two tawny
interpreters, to trace the mysteries of the Great River of America.
Sailing down the Wisconsin River, and reaching in a few days that
wide-rolling flood which we now call the Mississippi River, and floating
on its rough but kindly bosom for one hundred and eighty miles, they
landed on its western bank, and, crossing a narrow portage, struck,
without hurting, the Des Moines River. They were the first white men in
Iowa, and next to De Soto, one hundred and thirty-one years before them,
the only pale children that had ever looked into the wrinkled face of
the Father of Waters. Here they were met by four red men, who, in answer
to their inquiries, loftily proclaimed themselves to be “Illinois” or
“Men.” The spirit of Chicago, thus filtrated, antedated its own
settlement over one hundred and fifty years. Re-embarking, these Gallic
adventurers swept on down the rapidly rushing river unsnagged; passed in
safety the large open mouth of the Missouri; overlooked the future site
of St. Louis; refused to listen to the temptation which beckoned them to
ascend the Ohio to the future metropolis of bacon; floated along over
the rusting armor of De Soto, without diving for it, keeping a good
lookout on the dangerous territory of Arkansas on their right, and
Mississippi on their left, until they at last reached the point where
the Arkansas River hastens to throw its burden of earth and water upon
the back of the giant stream. Here they found Indians with European
weapons of steel; and they returned back, retracing their courageous
steps homeward. Marquette, let us add, preached for two years to the
wild men in and around the future Chicago, and finally died upon the
borders of a little stream in Michigan, which gratefully perpetuates his
name in its own.
Brave Marquette! He escaped the perils of Chicago to yield up his spirit
amid the innocencies of Michigan.
In 1682 La Salle, the French fur-trader, ventured down the Mississippi
to the Gulf, without stopping to take the bluff outposts that
sentinelled the future Vicksburg, and without halting over night at
Natchez, and encountering the loss of all his earnings in that
hazardous, porous, and absorbing place. Two years later he formed one of
a colony sent out from Rochelle, in France, by the minister Colbert, and
was wrecked in the Bay of Metagorda, the first of that large series of
castaways in that peculiarly enterprising empire called Texas.
France thus added the lone star to her American constellation.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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