The Comic Poems of Thomas Hood: A New and Complete EditionHood, Thomas
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The Comic Poems of Thomas Hood: A New and Complete Edition
Hood, Thomas
English poetry -- 19th century; English wit and humor
And here of Nature’s kindly care
Behold a curious proof,
As nags are meant to leap, she puts
A frog in every hoof!
Whereas the mare, although her share
She had of hoof and frog,
On coming to a gate stopped short
As stiff as any log;
While Huggins in the stirrup stood
With neck like neck of crane,
As sings the Scottish song--“to see
The _gate_ his _hart_ had gane.”
And, lo! the dim and distant hunt
Diminished in a trice:
The steeds, like Cinderella’s team,
Seemed dwindling into mice;
And, far remote, each scarlet coat
Soon flitted like a spark--
Though still the forest murmured back
An echo of the bark!
But sad at soul John Huggins turned:
No comfort could he find;
While thus the “Hunting Chorus” sped,
To stay five bars behind.
For though by dint of spur he got
A leap in spite of fate--
Howbeit there was no toll at all--
They could not clear the gate.
And, like Fitzjames, he cursed the hunt,
And sorely cursed the day,
And mused a New Gray’s elegy
On his departed gray.
Now many a sign at Woodford town
Its Inn-vitation tells:
But Huggins, full of ills, of course
Betook him to the Wells,
Where Rounding tried to cheer him up
With many a merry laugh:
But Huggins thought of neighbour Fig,
And called for half-and-half.
Yet, spite of drink, he could not blink
Remembrance of his loss;
To drown a care like his, required
Enough to drown a horse.
When thus forlorn, a merry horn
Struck up without the door--
The mounted mob were all returned;
The Epping Hunt was o’er!
And many a horse was taken out
Of saddle, and of shaft;
And men, by dint of drink, became
The only “_beasts of draught_.”
For now begun a harder run
On wine, and gin, and beer;
And overtaken men discussed
The overtaken deer.
How far he ran, and eke how fast,
And how at bay he stood,
Deerlike, resolved to sell his life
As dearly as he could:--
And how the hunters stood aloof,
Regardful of their lives,
And shunned a beast, whose very horns
They knew could _handle_ knives!
How Huggins stood when he was rubbed
By help and ostler kind,
And when they cleaned the clay before,
How worse “remained behind.”
And one, how he had found a horse
Adrift--a goodly gray!
And kindly rode the nag, for fear
The nag should go astray;
Now Huggins, when he heard the tale,
Jumped up with sudden glee;
[Illustration: THE JUDGMENT OF SOLOMON.]
[Illustration: “I WISH YOU MAY GET IT.”]
“A goodly gray! why, then, I say,
That gray belongs to me!
“Let me endorse again my horse,
Delivered safe and sound;
And gladly I will give the man
A bottle and a pound!”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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