The Comic Poems of Thomas Hood: A New and Complete EditionHood, Thomas
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The Comic Poems of Thomas Hood: A New and Complete Edition
Hood, Thomas
English poetry -- 19th century; English wit and humor
Pug, with some curious notions in his noddle,
Walk’d out at last, and turn’d into the Strand,
To the left hand,
Conning some portions of the previous twaddle,
And striding with a step that seem’d design’d
To represent the mighty March of Mind,
Instead of that slow waddle
Of thought, to which our ancestors inclin’d--
No wonder, then, that he should quickly find
He stood in front of that intrusive pile,
Where Cross keeps many a kind
Of bird confin’d,
And free-born animal, in durance vile--
A thought that stirr’d up all the monkey-bile!
The window stood ajar--
It was not far,
Nor, like Parnassus, very hard to climb--
The hour was verging on the supper-time,
And many a growl was sent through many a bar.
Meanwhile Pug scrambled upward like a tar,
And soon crept in,
Unnotic’d in the din
Of tuneless throats, that made the attics ring
With all the harshest notes that they could bring;
For like the Jews,
Wild beasts refuse,
In midst of their captivity--to sing.
Lord! how it made him chafe,
Full of his new emancipating zeal,
To look around upon this brute-bastille,
And see the king of creatures in--a safe!
The desert’s denizen in one small den,
Swallowing slavery’s most bitter pills--
A bear in bars unbearable. And then
The fretful porcupine, with all its quills
Imprison’d in a pen!
A tiger limited to four feet ten;
And, still worse lot,
A leopard to one spot!
An elephant enlarg’d,
But not discharg’d;
(It was before the elephant was shot;)
A doleful wanderoo, that wander’d not;
An ounce much disproportion’d to his pound.
Pug’s wrath wax’d hot
To gaze upon these captive creature’s round;
Whose claws--all scratching--gave him full assurance
They found their durance vile of vile endurance.
He went above--a solitary mounter
Up gloomy stairs--and saw a pensive group
Of hapless fowls--
Cranes, vultures, owls,
In fact, it was a sort of Poultry-Compter,
Where feather’d prisoners were doom’d to droop:
Here sat an eagle, forc’d to make a stoop,
Not from the skies, but his impending roof;
And there aloof,
A pining ostrich, moping in a coop;
With other samples of the bird creation,
All cag’d against their powers and their wills,
And cramp’d in such a space, the longest bills
Were plainly bills of least accommodation.
In truth, it was a very ugly scene
To fall to any liberator’s share,
To see those winged fowls, that once had been
Free as the wind, no freer than fixed air.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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