And was there then no argument To change the doctor’s vile intent, And move his pity?--yes, in truth, And that was--paying for the tooth. “Zounds! pay for such a stump! I’d rather--” But here the menace went no farther, For with his other ways of pinching, Hunks had a miser’s love of snuff, A recollection strong enough To cause a very serious flinching; In short he paid and had the feature Replaced as it was meant by nature; For tho’ by this ’twas cold to handle, (No corpse’s could have felt more horrid,) And white just like an end of candle, The doctor deemed and proved it too, That noses from the nose will do As well as noses from the forehead; So, fixed by dint of rag and lint, The part was bandaged up and muffled. The chair unfastened, Hunks arose, And shuffled out, for once unshuffled; And as he went, these words he snuffled-- “Well, this _is_ ‘paying thro’ the nose.’” THE LOGICIANS. AN ILLUSTRATION. “Metaphysics were a large field in which to exercise the weapons logic had put into their hands--“--SCRIBLERUS. See here two cavillers, Would-be unravellers Of abstruse theory and questions mystical In tête-à-tête, And deep debate, Wrangling according to form syllogistical. Glowing and ruddy The light streams in upon their deep brown study, And settles on our bald logician’s skull: But still his meditative eye looks dull And muddy, For he is gazing inwardly, like Plato; But to the world without And things about, His eye is blind as that of a potato: In fact, logicians See but by syllogisms--taste and smell By propositions; And never let the common dray-horse senses Draw inferences. How wise his brow! how eloquent his nose! The feature of itself is a negation! How gravely double is his chin, that shows Double deliberation; His scornful lip forestalls the confutation! O this is he that wisely with a major And minor proves a greengage is no gauger!-- By help of ergo, That cheese of sage will make no mite the sager, And Taurus is no bull to toss up Virgo! O this is he that logically tore his Dog into dogmas--following Aristotle-- Cut up his cap into ten categories, And cork’d an abstract conjuror in a bottle! O this is he that disembodied matter, And proved that incorporeal corporations Put nothing in no platter, And for mock turtle only supp’d sensations! O this is he that palpably decided, With grave and mathematical precision How often atoms may be subdivided By long division; O this is he that show’d I is not I, And made a ghost of personal identity; Proved “Ipse” absent by an alibi, And frisking in some other person’s entity; He sounded all philosophies in truth,