Their mental education I discovered went scarcely between the three R’s, reading, writing and arithmetic and their reading consisted in as feverish an application to detective literature as would have distinguished a statesman in my time. They rose late in the morning and spent a greater part of the day in the bath with solicitous applications for the softening of their skins, which were of an extraordinary velvety texture. The oiling, perfuming and curling of their hair occupied another two hours, after which they trained themselves in the intricate choreographic steps which they would later display to delight the eyes of the stronger sex. The habit of gambling was a mania with them and even in their baths which were of a Roman splendor, they were continually throwing dice in a dozen different and extremely intricate games. At night they remained until the small hours engrossed in their cards in a game which was a strange development of poker and contract bridge. When I attempted to arouse them from their torpor of indulgence by recitals of the exploits of the male heroes of other days, citing the explorers who with adventurous courage had braved the Arctic colds, dared the terrors of the deep, or first laid their perilous courses across the uncharted sky, I found that the very idea of such dangers appalled their imaginations. The invariable response was that it was a woman’s world and some frankly proclaimed that the revolt I was urging, meant nothing but exchanging a pleasant life of sheltered ease for tasks of effort and responsibility. I was, I admit, in despair of any success, when fortunately I discovered a small group whose racial characteristics marked them as descendants of the Irish Isles. Knowing the strong instinct of that rebellious race to any and all existing forms of government, I worked upon this strain and found to my delight a responsive enthusiasm. It was then that my first inspiration returned to my memory. I determined to begin at the beginning of all revolts, by teaching these supernaturally sober-faced descendants the art of laughing. Applying the same physical methods I had used in the home of Acquilla, I succeeded in a few days in completely changing the character of the community. No sooner had they been instructed into the manly art of laughter than they began to seek by all manner of practical jokes a means for giving vent to these new emotions. From morning to night the Club was filled with boisterous outbursts and I became at last an acknowledged leader.