That is so, no doubt. PISH. We might reserve that point. POOH. True, it could be argued six months hence, before the full Court. KO. Besides, I don't see how a man can cut off his own head. POOH. A man might try. PISH. Even if you only succeeded in cutting it half off, that would be something. POOH. It would be taken as an earnest of your desire to comply with the Imperial will. KO. No. Pardon me, but there I am adamant. As official Headsman, my reputation is at stake, and I can't consent to embark on a professional operation unless I see my way to a successful result. POOH. This professional conscientiousness is highly creditable to you, but it places us in a very awkward position. KO. My good sir, the awkwardness of your position is grace itself compared with that of a man engaged in the act of cutting off his own head. PISH. I am afraid that, unless you can obtain a substitute —— KO. A substitute? Oh, certainly—nothing easier. (To Pooh-Bah.) Pooh-Bah, I appoint you Lord High Substitute. POOH. I should be delighted. Such an appointment would realize my fondest dreams. But no, at any sacrifice, I must set bounds to my insatiable ambition! TRIO Ko-Ko Pooh-Bah Pish-Tush My brain it teams I am so proud, I heard one day With endless schemes If I allowed A gentleman say Both good and new My family pride That criminals who For Titipu; To be my guide, Are cut in two But if I flit, I'd volunteer Can hardly feel The benefit To quit this sphere The fatal steel, That I'd diffuse Instead of you And so are slain The town would lose! In a minute or two, Without much pain. Now every man But family pride If this is true, To aid his clan Must be denied, It's jolly for you; Should plot and plan And set aside, Your courage screw As best he can, And mortified. To bid us adieu, And so, And so, And go Although Although And show I'm ready to go, I wish to go, Both friend and foe Yet recollect And greatly pine How much you dare. 'Twere disrespect To brightly shine, I'm quite aware Did I neglect And take the line It's your affair, To thus effect Of a hero fine, Yet I declare This aim direct, With grief condign I'd take your share, So I object— I must decline— But I don't much care—