But a true woman dont cultivate neither ov these patches in her heart; the ever elegant perceptions ov her instincts teaches her not to take up the sword ov the coquett, nor the remorseless pruning-hook of the prude. It seems to me, the more that I gaze at it, that a prude iz nothing more than a coquett gone to seed. I would rather be a coquett than a prude; thare iz some fun in it--thare is viktory in it; while prudery, at best, iz only a defeat in an inglorious cauze. Coquetts sumtimes git marrid, but they are az hard to tame az a patridge, and aint worth enny more after they are tamed, besides being a heap more jealous than a mother-in-law to their daughters; while a prude, for a wife, iz but the bluest kind ov a school-marm at home on a furlough. In conclusion, I would say, in all kindness, to the coquetts, that they seldom hav but one fust-class man in their nets; all that they bag afterward are of the same breed az themselves; and to the prudes I would suggest that wimmin are growing more plenty every year, and that thare are but few ov them, who insist upon it, that will pay the wear and tear ov a humiliating and laborious siege. FOLKS WE ALL KNO. THE EFFEMINATE MAN. The effeminate man is a weak poultiss. He is a kross between root beer and ginger pop with the cork left out ov the bottle over night. He is a fresh water mermaid lost in a cow pastur, with his hands filled with dandylions. He is a tea-kup full of whipped sillybub--a kitten in pantylets--a sick monkey with a blonde mustash. He is a vine without enny tendrills--a fly drowned in sweet ile--a paper kite in a ded calm. He lives as the butterflise do--noboddy kan tell whi. He is as harmless as a cent’s wuth ov spruce gum, and as useless as a shirt button without enny button-hole. He is as lazy as a bread-pill, and has no more hope than a last year’s grasshopper. He is a man without enny gaul, and a woman without enny gissard. He goes thru life on his tiptose, and dies like colone water spilt on the ground. THE JEALOUS MAN. The _Jealous Man_ iz alwus a-hunting. He is alwus a-hunting for sumthing that he don’t expeckt tew find, and after he haz found it then he iz mad bekauze he haz. Theze fellers don’t beleaf in spooks, and yet they are about the only folks who ever see enny. A jealous man iz alwus happy, jist in perposhun az he iz mizerable. Jelosy iz a disseaze, and it iz a good deal like sea sickness--dreadful sick and kan’t vomit. THE ANONYMOUS MAN. The _Anonymous Man_ boards at a red tavern, and pays for hiz board bi tending bar occasionly. He hain’t got any more karakter than the jack ov spades haz, when it ain’t trumps. He iz a loafer bi profession, without enny vices. He rides on the box, once in a while, with the driver, and noboddy thinks ov asking him for hiz stage fare. He iz az useless az an extra pump would be in the desert ov Sarah.