I forgot to state that i saw one man at Saratoga drink 9 glasses ov mineral water konsekutiff. They sed he waz a sailor--a regular old psalt. I also saw one man at Long Branch drink more water than he could swaller. He cum very near drounding to deth. But thare iz excepshuns tew the general rule. SUM VEGETABEL HISTORY. The strawberry is one ov natur’s sweet pets. She makes them worth fifty cents, the fust she makes, and never allows them tew be sold at a mean price. The culler ov the strawberry iz like the setting sun under a thin cloud, with a delicate dash of the rain bo in it; its fragrance iz like the breath ov a baby, when it fust begins tew eat wintergreen lossingers; its flavor is like the nektar which an old-fashioned goddess used tew leave in the bottom ov her tumbler, when Jupiter stood treat on Mount Ida. There iz menny breeds ov this delightful vegetable, but not a mean one in the whole lot. I think i have stole them, laying around loose, without enny pedigree, in sumboddy’s tall grass, when I waz a lazy schoolboy, that eat dredful easy, without enny white sugar on them, and even a bug occasionally mixed with them in the hurry of the moment. Cherrys are good, but they are too mutch like sucking a marble, with a handle tew it. Peaches are good, if yu don’t git enny ov the pin-feathers into yure lips. Watermelons will suit ennyboddy who iz satisfied with halfsweetened drink; but the man who can eat strawberrys besprinkled with crushed shuggar, and besmattered with sweet cream, (at sumboddy else’s expense), and not lay hiz hand on hiz stummuk, and thank the author ov strawberrys and stummuks, iz a man with a worn-out conscience--a man whose mouth tastes like a hole in the ground, that don’t care what goes down it. * * * * * NEW ASHFORD. The village ov New Ashford iz lokated in the state ov Massachusetts, and iz about 150 miles west ov Plymouth rok. It iz one ov them towns that dont make enny fuss, but for pure water, pure morals, and good rye, and injun bread, it stands on tiptoze. It waz settled soon after the landing ov the pilgrims, bi sum ov that party, and like all the Nu England towns, waz, at one time, selebrated for its stern religious creed, and its excellent rum and tanzy. It may seem a leetle strange, tew these latter day saints, tew hear me mix up rum and religion together, but i had an Unkle, who preached God’s word in the next town south ov New Ashford, 80 years ago, who died in due time, and went to heaven. This genial old saint alwus took, on week daze, three magnificent horns ov rum and tanzy, and Sundaze he took four. I hav no doubt it lengthened out hiz time, and braced up hiz faith. But i wouldn’t advise enny ov the yung klergy ov to-day tew meddle with rum and tanzy, az a fertilizer. The tanzy iz all rite--it grows az green and az bitter az ever; for man kant adulturate it, but the rum haz bin bedeviled into rank pizon.