Envy--A disease original with Cain, but which hiz brother Abel afterward caught, and died suddenly ov. Belle--A female boss ov the situation. Fancy--The flirtashun ov truth. Sarcasm--An undertaker in tears. Sulks--Deff and dum madness. Courting--A hugg and kiss match, generally a drawn game. Fiction--A lie with holiday clothes on. Hen--A lay member. Law--The shackels ov liberty. Science--The literature ov truth. Deceit--A ded wasp with a live tail. Babys--Dividend. Miser--A wretch who haz dug out hiz heart tew sto away hiz munny in. Misfortunes--A band ov vagrants, who liv on what they kan steal. Spirituolist--A curb stone broker, who sells exchange on Ben Franklin & Co. Inheritance--Second-hand goods, other people’s leavings. Ironclads--Vessels ov wrath. Grave Yard--A small patch ov land, cultivated by the dead, lieing between time and eternity. Lap Dogs--A nucleus for affeckshun out ov a job. Society--Burning on an alter natral rights, and then sacredly watching over the ashes. Jealousy--Self love. Stingyness--The bran ov economy. Buck Saw--An instrument ov torture. Bragadocio--One who pulls hiz own courage by the noze. Anxiety--Milking a kicking heifer with one hand, and holding her by the tail with the other. Swearing--The metalic currency ov loafers. Judicious Benevolence--The brains ov the heart. Blue Jay--The fop ov the forest. Policy--“Honesty iz the best policy,” but policy iz not alwus the best honesty. Bachelor--The hero ov a cot bedstead. Club Houses--Whare the hen-pecked go tew sware, and smooth out their feathers. Lie--The cowardice ov truth. Skunk--An athletick animal, stronger than an elephant. OWLY. Here we have a batch of immaculate truths from the “Owl Club.” After the minutes of the last meeting had been read and approved, each “Owl,” as is their custom, lit his cigar, shook out his feathers, and story-telling commenced, the President leading off as usual. “I never can hear of a man’s gitting his head broke,” said the President, “but I call to mind the wonderful accident that occured at Austin, Texas, twenty years ago. “A man was thrown from his horse, while riding at full speed into town, and striking against the sharp edge of a potash kettle, which lay beside the road, his head was split down to his collar-bone, each half hanging over his shoulders like a pair ov epaulettes. “This man was taken up for dead, but recovered, by skillful treatment, and was elected county judge afterward on the strength of this accident.” “A very good story, and undoubtedly true,” said the Vice-President “Owl,” “but I don’t think it quite so miraculous as the different escapes that Joe French, a friend of mine, a clerk on one of the Mississippi steamboats, has passed safely through. “His last adventure was on the high-pressure steamer Hurricane. “As she was passing Natches, on a down trip, she blew up, and filled the air with every kind of fragments.