It interested me to listen to these people, and their mutual respect
and equality surprised me. They argued with heat, but they did not
offend each other with evil language and abuse. At times the blood
would mount to Uncle Peter's head, and he would tremble; but Mikhail
only lowered his voice and seemed to bend his large opponent to the
earth. Two men stood opposite me, and both of them denied God out of
the fulness of their sincere faith!
"But what is my faith?" I asked myself, and found no answer.
During my stay with Mikhail the thought about the place of God among
people sank and lost its strength and dropped its former boldness and
was supplanted by a quantity of other thoughts, and instead of the
question, "Where is God?" stood other questions: "Who am I, and why?
Wherefore do I seek God?"
I understood that it was senseless.
In the evenings workingmen came to Mikhail and interesting
conversations took place. The teacher spoke to them about life and
explained to them the laws which were bad. He knew them remarkably
well and explained them clearly. The workingmen were mostly young men,
dried up by the heat of the factory. Their skins were eaten by soot,
their faces were dark, their eyes sorrowful. They listened with serious
eagerness, silent and frowning, and at first they seemed to me morose
and servile. But later I understood their life better and saw that they
could sing and dance and joke with the young girls.
The conversations of Mikhail and his uncle were always on the same
subjects--the power of money, the abasement of the workingmen, the
greed of the masters and the absolute necessity of destroying divisions
of men into classes.
But I was no workingman and no master. I was not in search of
money, and they laid too much stress on capital, and thereby lowered
themselves. At first I argued with Mikhail, pointing out that man's
first duty was to find his spiritual birthplace and that then he would
see his own place on earth, and he would find his freedom.
I spoke briefly, but with heat. The workingmen listened to my speech
good-naturedly and attentively, like honest judges, and some of the
elder ones even agreed with me. But when I finished Mikhail began with
his quiet smile and annihilated my words.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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