The Confession of a Child of the CenturyMusset, Alfred de
General
The Confession of a Child of the Century
Musset, Alfred de
French fiction; Historical fiction
could not have been understood by an indifferent spectator; at times they
appeared the most happy of living creatures, and the next moment the most
unhappy; but although ignorant of their secret, one would have felt that
they were suffering together, and, whatever their mysterious trouble, it
could be seen that they had placed on their sorrow a seal more powerful
than love itself--friendship. While their hands were clasped their
glances were chaste; although they were alone, they spoke in low tones.
As though overcome by their feelings they sat face to face, although
their lips did not touch. They looked at each other tenderly and
solemnly. When the clock struck one, the woman heaved a sigh and said:
"Octave, are you sure of yourself?"
"Yes, my friend, I am resolved. I will suffer much, a long time, perhaps
forever; but we will cure ourselves, you with time, I with God."
"Octave, Octave," repeated the woman, "are you sure you are not deceiving
yourself?"
"I do not believe we can forget each other; but I believe that we can
forgive and that is what I desire even at the price of separation."
"Why could we not meet again? Why not some day--you are so young!"
Then she added with a smile: "We could see each other without danger."
"No, my friend, for you must know that I could never see you again
without loving you. May he to whom I bequeath you be worthy of you! Smith
is brave, good and honest, but however much you may love him, you see
very well that you still love me, for if I should decide to remain, or to
take you away with me, you would consent."
"It is true," replied the woman.
"True! true!" repeated the young man, looking into her eyes with all his
soul. "Is it true that if I wished it you would go with me?"
Then he continued softly: "That is the reason I must never see you again.
There are certain loves in life that overturn the head, the senses, the
mind, the heart; there is among them all but one that does not disturb,
that penetrates, and that dies only with the being in which it has taken
root."
"But you will write to me?"
"Yes, at first, for what I have to suffer is so keen that the absence of
the habitual object of my love would kill me. When I was unknown to you,
I gradually approached closer and closer to you until--but let us not go
into the past. Little by little my letters will become less frequent
until they cease altogether. I will thus descend the hill that I have
been climbing for the past year. When one stands before a fresh grave,
over which are engraved two cherished names, one experiences a mysterious
sense of grief, which causes tears to trickle down one's cheeks; it is
thus that I wish to remember having once lived."
At these words the woman threw herself on the couch and burst into tears.
The young man wept with her, but he did not move and seemed anxious to
appear unconscious of her emotion. When her tears ceased to flow, he
approached her, took her hand in his and kissed it.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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