"'And all in Court, take warning by The furious Canterer's fate, And go not up the Primrose path At such an awful rate. "'But if your sluggish livers you Must vigorously shake, "Vigor's Horse Exercise at Home" (Vide Prospectus) take.'" As a matter of fact, the magistrate did not look at the charge-sheet, or know me, or catch my name, or he might have made his usual joke at my expense in another way. [Illustration: MY PORTRAIT, BY F. C. BURNAND.] Mr. Burnand and I rode a great deal together. Avoiding the Row, my editor preferred to ride to Hampstead, Harrow, or Mill Hill, calling for me on the way. Once, when I could not ride, he wrote: "Very sorry to hear of your being laid up with a cold; it shows what even the Wisest and Best amongst us are liable to. The idea is monstrous of a _Cold Furniss_. A _coal'd_ furniss is satisfactory. Don't take too much out of yourself with riding. 'He speaks to thee who hath not got a horse'--Shakespeare." Then follows later a specimen of his irrepressible good humour: _22 Nov._ "Alas and alack! I've got a hack, But the weather's been such, I've not got on his back. "I got no jog Because of the fog, And up to twelve, In breeches and boots, Which I had to shelve And recover my foots. I lunched at the 'G' (So there was, you see, One _Gee_ for me). "Then I came back And wrote some play But oh, good lack! No riding to-day. If foggy here, At Ramsgate 'twas clear. "Alas and alack! I'll sell my hack, Much to my sorrow. I'll ride to-morrow, That is, if fine, But not at nine. I shall not start, if I'm alive And have the heart, till ten forty-five. "Away to parks I'll trot To get a little hot, Also to get a little dirty, And with you be 11.30. "Till one, Then done. Back to Lunch, Then to Office of _Punch_. This my plan, you'll be happy to learn, is At your disposal, Mr. Furniss." But excursions in search of material my editor and I had to do on foot, and were not so pleasing; still, Mr. Burnand always managed to have his little joke in all circumstances. [Illustration]