The Confessions of Jean Jacques Rousseau — CompleteRousseau, Jean-Jacques
Philosophy
The Confessions of Jean Jacques Rousseau — Complete
Rousseau, Jean-Jacques
Authors, French -- 18th century -- Biography; Rousseau, Jean-Jacques, 1712-1778
A few days after this catastrophe; my hostess, who, as I have already
observed, was very friendly, with great satisfaction informed me she
had heard of a situation, and that a lady of rank desired to see me. I
immediately thought myself in the road to great adventures; that being
the point to which all my ideas tended: this, however, did not prove so
brilliant as I had conceived it. I waited on the lady with the servant
who had mentioned me: she asked a number of questions, and my answers
not displeasing her, I immediately entered into her service not, indeed,
in the quality of favorite, but as a footman. I was clothed like
the rest of her people, the only difference being, they wore a
shoulder-knot, which I had not, and, as there was no lace on her
livery, it appeared merely a tradesman’s suit. This was the unforeseen
conclusion of all my great expectancies!
The Countess of Vercellis, with whom I now lived, was a widow without
children; her husband was a Piedmontese, but I always believed her to
be a Savoyard, as I could have no conception that a native of Piedmont
could speak such good French, and with so pure an accent. She was a
middle-aged woman, of a noble appearance and cultivated understanding,
being fond of French literature, in which she was well versed. Her
letters had the expression, and almost the elegance of Madam de
Savigne’s; some of them might have been taken for hers. My principal
employ, which was by no means displeasing to me, was to write from her
dictating; a cancer in the breast, from which she suffered extremely,
not permitting her to write herself.
Madam de Vercellis not only possessed a good understanding, but a strong
and elevated soul. I was with her during her last illness, and saw her
suffer and die, without showing an instant of weakness, or the least
effort of constraint; still retaining her feminine manners, without
entertaining an idea that such fortitude gave her any claim to
philosophy; a word which was not yet in fashion, nor comprehended by
her in the sense it is held at present. This strength of disposition
sometimes extended almost to apathy, ever appearing to feel as little
for others as herself; and when she relieved the unfortunate, it was
rather for the sake of acting right, than from a principle of real
commiseration. I have frequently experienced this insensibility, in some
measure, during the three months I remained with her. It would have been
natural to have had an esteem for a young man of some abilities, who
was incessantly under her observation, and that she should think, as
she felt her dissolution approaching, that after her death he would have
occasion for assistance and support: but whether she judged me unworthy
of particular attention, or that those who narrowly watched all her
motions, gave her no opportunity to think of any but themselves, she did
nothing for me.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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