The Confidence-Man: His MasqueradeMelville, Herman
General
The Confidence-Man: His Masquerade
Melville, Herman
Mississippi River -- Fiction; Satire; Steamboats -- Fiction; Swindlers and swindling -- Fiction
"What do you remark? I respectfully repeat." But, as no answer came,
only the low, half-suppressed growl, as of Bruin in a hollow trunk, the
questioner continued: "Well, sir, if you will permit me, in my small
way, to speak for you, you remark, respected sir, an incipient creation;
loose sort of sketchy thing; a little preliminary rag-paper study, or
careless cartoon, so to speak, of a man. The idea, you see, respected
sir, is there; but, as yet, wants filling out. In a word, respected sir,
the man-child is at present but little, every way; I don't pretend to
deny it; but, then, he _promises_ well, does he not? Yes, promises very
well indeed, I may say. (So, too, we say to our patrons in reference to
some noble little youngster objected to for being a _dwarf_.) But, to
advance one step further," extending his thread-bare leg, as he drew a
pace nearer, "we must now drop the figure of the rag-paper cartoon, and
borrow one--to use presently, when wanted--from the horticultural
kingdom. Some bud, lily-bud, if you please. Now, such points as the
new-born man-child has--as yet not all that could be desired, I am free
to confess--still, such as they are, there they are, and palpable as
those of an adult. But we stop not here," taking another step. "The
man-child not only possesses these present points, small though they
are, but, likewise--now our horticultural image comes into play--like
the bud of the lily, he contains concealed rudiments of others; that
is, points at present invisible, with beauties at present dormant."
"Come, come, this talk is getting too horticultural and beautiful
altogether. Cut it short, cut it short!"
"Respected sir," with a rustily martial sort of gesture, like a decayed
corporal's, "when deploying into the field of discourse the vanguard of
an important argument, much more in evolving the grand central forces of
a new philosophy of boys, as I may say, surely you will kindly allow
scope adequate to the movement in hand, small and humble in its way as
that movement may be. Is it worth my while to go on, respected sir?"
"Yes, stop flunkying and go on."
Thus encouraged, again the philosopher with the brass-plate proceeded:
"Supposing, sir, that worthy gentleman (in such terms, to an applicant
for service, we allude to some patron we chance to have in our eye),
supposing, respected sir, that worthy gentleman, Adam, to have been
dropped overnight in Eden, as a calf in the pasture; supposing that,
sir--then how could even the learned serpent himself have foreknown that
such a downy-chinned little innocent would eventually rival the goat in
a beard? Sir, wise as the serpent was, that eventuality would have been
entirely hidden from his wisdom."
"I don't know about that. The devil is very sagacious. To judge by the
event, he appears to have understood man better even than the Being who
made him."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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