The Cornhill Magazine (Vol. I, No. 6, June 1860)Various
History
The Cornhill Magazine (Vol. I, No. 6, June 1860)
Various
England -- Periodicals; English literature -- Periodicals; Short stories, English -- Periodicals
The bishop again rubbed his hands, and said that he was sure she would.
He never felt quite at his ease with Miss Dunstable, as he rarely could
ascertain whether or no she was earnest in what she was saying. So
he trotted off, muttering some excuse as he went, and Miss Dunstable
chuckled with an inward chuckle at his too evident bewilderment. Miss
Dunstable was by nature kind, generous, and open-hearted; but she was
living now very much with people on whom kindness, generosity, and
open-heartedness were thrown away. She was clever also, and could be
sarcastic; and she found that those qualities told better in the world
around her than generosity and an open heart. And so she went on from
month to month, and year to year, not progressing in a good spirit as she
might have done, but still carrying within her bosom a warm affection
for those she could really love. And she knew that she was hardly living
as she should live,—that the wealth which she affected to despise was
eating into the soundness of her character, not by its splendour, but
by the style of life which it had seemed to produce as a necessity. She
knew that she was gradually becoming irreverent, scornful, and prone to
ridicule; but yet, knowing this and hating it, she hardly knew how to
break from it.
She had seen so much of the blacker side of human nature that blackness
no longer startled her as it should do. She had been the prize at which
so many ruined spendthrifts had aimed; so many pirates had endeavoured
to run her down while sailing in the open waters of life, that she
had ceased to regard such attempts on her money-bags as unmanly or
over-covetous. She was content to fight her own battle with her own
weapons, feeling secure in her own strength of purpose and strength of
wit.
Some few friends she had whom she really loved,—among whom her inner self
could come out and speak boldly what it had to say with its own true
voice. And the woman who thus so spoke was very different from that Miss
Dunstable whom Mrs. Proudie courted, and the Duke of Omnium fêted, and
Mrs. Harold Smith claimed as her bosom friend. If only she could find
among such one special companion on whom her heart might rest, who would
help her to bear the heavy burdens of her world! But where was she to
find such a friend?—she with her keen wit, her untold money, and loud
laughing voice. Everything about her was calculated to attract those whom
she could not value, and to scare from her the sort of friend to whom she
would fain have linked her lot.
And then she met Mrs. Harold Smith, who had taken Mrs. Proudie’s noble
suite of rooms in her tour for the evening, and was devoting to them a
period of twenty minutes. “And so I may congratulate you,” Miss Dunstable
said eagerly to her friend.
“No, in mercy’s name do no such thing, or you may too probably have to
uncongratulate me again; and that will be so unpleasant.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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