To satisfy the wants of these organs, leads to greed, selfishness, fraud, forgery, deception, falsehood, corruption, etc. The pleasures resulting therefrom are accompanied by vanity, pride, pamperedness, envy, jealousy, hate, discontent, etc. The indulgences are known as drunkenness, lust, lasciviousness, fornication, adultery, obscenity, debauchery, whoredom, luxury, revelry, and by many other terms. These form the theme of the prophets and the burden of the apostles. These are the sins, the vices, they have been trying to crush and wipe out with their theological absurdities for several thousand years. They have created all sorts of bugaboos to frighten fools, idiots, and stupid ignoramuses into discipline. They have created hell, purgatory, dark and deep pits, brimstone and fire. The gentleman devil, or Mr. Satan, presides over the lower regions, conducts their affairs, only to accommodate the spiritual fraternity, from the pope to the Rev. Sam Patch. But in order to be saved, to go to heaven--an imaginary abode in the atmosphere, a sort of ethereal paradise in the upper strata of the air that surrounds this globe, either with or without sunlight--in order to get one up there some clown of a priest will mumble off masses, a sort of ribald fustian composition that will raise your spirit or your soul right up into the pure upper strata of this terrestrial atmospheric crust. Of course if there are seven heavens you must pay accordingly. In case, however, you miss the aerial place, the heaven, and accidentally become one of the devil's subjects, it stands to reason that Satan requires an extra fee to release you from eternal punishment--which the good, pious priest puts into his pocket.