England -- Social life and customs -- 19th century -- Fiction; London (England) -- Fiction
"It is a change in myself--I was too hasty--I reflected afterwards
instead of before----"
"Forgive me if I make the most of that admission. Your hastiness was
certainly not my fault. I did not unduly press you; there was no
importunity. Such being the case, don't you think I may suggest that
you ought to bear the consequences? I can't--I really can't think them
so dreadful."
Irene kept silence, her face bent and averted.
"Many a girl has gone through what you feel now, but I doubt whether
ever one before acted like this. They kept their word; it was a point
of honour."
"I know; it is true." She forced herself to look at him. "And the
result was lives of misery--dishonour--tragedies."
"Oh, come now----"
"You _dare_ not contradict me!" Her eyes flashed; she let her feeling
have its way. "As a man of the world, you know the meaning of such
marriages, and what they may, what they do often, come to. A girl hears
of such facts--realises them too late. You smile. No, I don't want to
talk for effect; it isn't my way. All I mean is that I, like so many
girls who have never been in love, accepted an offer of marriage on the
wrong grounds, and came to feel my mistake--who knows how?--not long
after. What you are asking me to do, is to pay for the innocent error
with my life. The price is too great. You speak of your feelings; they
are not so strong as to justify such a demand--And there's another
thought that surely must have entered your mind. Knowing that I feel it
impossible to marry you, how can you still, with any shadow of
self-respect, urge me to do so? Is your answer, again, fear of what
people will say? That seems to me more than cowardice. How strange that
an honourable man doesn't see it so!"
Jacks abandoned his easy posture, sat straight, and fixed upon her a
look of masculine disdain.
"I simply don't believe in the impossibility of your becoming my wife."
"Then talk is useless. I can only tell you the truth, and reclaim my
liberty."
"It's a question of time. You wouldn't--well, say you couldn't marry me
to-morrow. A month hence you would be willing. Because you suffer from
a passing illusion, I am to unsettle all my arrangements, and face an
intolerable humiliation. The thing is impossible."
With vast relief Irene heard him return upon this note, and strike it
so violently. She felt no more compunction. The man was finally
declared to her, and she could hold her own against him. Her headache
had grown fierce; her mouth was dry; shudders of hot and cold ran
through her. The struggle must end soon.
"I am forgetting hospitality," she said, with sudden return to her
ordinary voice. "You would like tea."
Arnold waved his hand contemptuously.
"No?--Then let us understand each other in the fewest possible words."
"Good." He smiled, a smile which seemed to tighten every muscle of his
face. "I decline to release you from your promise."
She could meet his gaze, and did so as she answered with cold
collectedness:
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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