The Cruise of the "Scandal", and other storiesBridges, Victor
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The Cruise of the "Scandal", and other stories
Bridges, Victor
English fiction -- 20th century; Short stories, English
"I raised my pistol, but as I did so the words of the Sheikh Al-Abbas
came flooding into my mind. 'I wish,' said I clearly and without
hesitation, 'that I was in Peshawar.'
"For a moment my eyes closed. When I opened them I was standing
outside the house in Peshawar where I had lately lodged."
At this point I laid down the manuscript and burst into a shout of
laughter.
Bruce leaned across and picked it up. "You think it's all nonsense?"
he said.
"I think," said I, "that as an explorer your uncle can give points to
Louis de Rougemont and Dr. Cook. The picture of him suddenly
appearing naked in the main street of Peshawar, with a pistol in one
hand and the Nadir Bandar in the other, is about the richest touch of
imagination I've ever struck."
"You think it's all a lie?" persisted Bruce.
I stared at him.
"My dear chap," I said, "it's either a lie or else the old boy was as
mad as a March hare. Considering he left his money to a publisher, I
personally incline to the latter theory."
Bruce sat silent for a minute, scratching his ear. Then he laughed
in a rather apologetic sort of fashion.
"You'll think I'm dotty, too," he said, "but do you know, upon my
soul, I believe there's something in it."
"Oh, get out!" I said; "and pass me the whisky."
Bruce handed over the bottle.
"I'm not joking," he went on obstinately. "I've got a funny sort of
feeling that the old chap was speaking the truth."
"You ought to take something for it," I said. "Mother Seigel or Dr.
William's Pink Pills for Neurotic Nephews."
Bruce got up, and, crossing to the mantelpiece, began to fill a pipe.
For some moments we both remained silent.
"Well, look here," he broke out at last rather awkwardly, "I'm going
to have a wish and see what happens."
I shook my head with a kind of mock disapproval.
"You're sure to be sorry," I said. "These things always turn out
badly. Think of 'Uncle Peter's Fairy Story.'"
"What's that?" asked Bruce.
"It's a book," I replied, "a book that delighted my early childhood.
As far as I can recollect, everyone in it was allowed to have one
wish, and the results were--well, not quite what they expected. I
remember one kind-hearted lady wishing that the blacksmith's baby,
who was dying of consumption, should be as well and strong as its
father. In about three minutes the baby was decimating the village
with a sledge-hammer."
"I shall be very careful," remarked Bruce, a little uncomfortably.
"I----"
"By the way," I interrupted, "what happened to your uncle? You took
away his manuscript before I'd finished it."
"He never had any more wishes," said Bruce. "That first shot seems
to have frightened him off it."
I laughed.
"I don't wonder," I said. "One experience like that would be enough
to make me sign the pledge for ever."
Bruce came to the table and picked up the Nadir Bandar.
"What are you going to wish?" I asked mischievously. "For goodness'
sake be careful."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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