Belief and doubt -- Fiction; Clergy -- Fiction; Methodists -- Fiction; New York (State) -- Fiction; Psychological fiction
He could bear the uncertainty no longer. Was it indeed not entirely his
own fault that it had existed thus long? No man with the spirit of a
mouse would have shilly-shallied in this preposterous fashion, week
after week, with the fever of a beautiful woman's kiss in his blood, and
the woman herself living only round the corner. The whole world had been
as good as offered to him--a bewildering world of wealth and beauty and
spiritual exaltation and love--and he, like a weak fool, had waited for
it to be brought to him on a salver, as it were, and actually forced
upon his acceptance! “That is my failing,” he reflected; “these
miserable ecclesiastical bandages of mine have dwarfed my manly side.
The meanest of Thurston's clerks would have shown a more adventurous
spirit and a bolder nerve. If I do not act at once, with courage and
resolution, everything will be lost. Already she must think me unworthy
of the honor it was in her sweet will to bestow.” Then he remembered
that she was now always at home. “Not another hour of foolish
indecision!” he whispered to himself. “I will put my destiny to the
test. I will see her today!”
A middle-aged, plain-faced servant answered his ring at the door-bell
of the Madden mansion. She was palpably Irish, and looked at him with a
saddened preoccupation in her gray eyes, holding the door only a little
ajar.
Theron had got out one of his cards. “I wish to make inquiry about
young Mr. Madden--Mr. Michael Madden,” he said, holding the card forth
tentatively. “I have only just heard of his illness, and it has been a
great grief to me.”
“He is no better,” answered the woman, briefly.
“I am the Rev. Mr. Ware,” he went on, “and you may say that, if he is
well enough, I should be glad to see him.”
The servant peered out at him with a suddenly altered expression, then
shook her head. “I don't think he would be wishing to see YOU,” she
replied. It was evident from her tone that she suspected the visitor's
intentions.
Theron smiled in spite of himself. “I have not come as a clergyman,” he
explained, “but as a friend of the family. If you will tell Miss Madden
that I am here, it will do just as well. Yes, we won't bother him. If
you will kindly hand my card to his sister.”
When the domestic turned at this and went in, Theron felt like throwing
his hat in the air, there where he stood. The woman's churlish sectarian
prejudices had played ideally into his hands. In no other imaginable way
could he have asked for Celia so naturally. He wondered a little that a
servant at such a grand house as this should leave callers standing on
the doorstep. Still more he wondered what he should say to the lady of
his dream when he came into her presence.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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