Male friendship -- Fiction; Man-woman relationships -- Fiction; New York (N.Y.) -- Fiction; Young men -- Fiction
Already a force worked in him, digesting this dense life, making it a
function of his own, making its subtle fumes a stimulant for the force
making it a function. Tom’s mind groped, as he walked lightly, for an
old-time hurt.... He had been badly cut in the wrist by a fall through a
rocky road. For a month his cut wrist was bound close. When the bandage
was off and the air let in, his wrist had seemed to possess a power of
flight out of all proportion with his other wrist, with the remainder of
his body. This had made for dissonance. It was as if only by good
attention he held the soaring wrist in place. So now, his suddenly
liberated will, as compared to all his body. Tom relaxed on the balls of
his feet and had the adroitness to look about him. His field, this. In
his two prematurely aged hands could he not toss this world? He felt
power, he felt grace. His eyes gleamed. He laughed. Words, polished and
caparisoned, flew from his mouth as if the Design fitting them to him
were absolute, were mystic. Tom’s body was taut now. His mind had
gathered in this reeling quality. But his body held to his will, as an
artist sways to his violin. Meantime, still, the brittle density along
whose imperceptible grain Tom flowed. Ladies with subtle ways of calling
attention to their bosoms by suppressing them: their arms came angularly
forth from the compressed and mysterious domain like spouts of
energy--like escapes of self. So their arms, so their voices. At arm’s
end a tea-cup: at voice’s end a word. Neither important. Sip tea, sip
words. But the attention was engrossed in a deeper quaffing. These
spouting shreds of self could be joined, could create a circuit, could
release a current from heart to heart, from loin to loin. Tom felt this.
He felt the suffused emotion of this splintering welter. He saw in the
words, in the arms of ladies, sparks of invitation, fuses corruscating
back to mute stores of combustible sensation. All of the afternoon
seemed a disguisement, a limitless deferring of the reality of all the
wills there massed. Tom wondered by what constant guard the fuses never
burned to their full length, the explosives never went off: how they
kept sheathed from this glitter of temptation. He perceived that the
flames were cold and lightless. He perceived that the fires shot off
into air: were free of substance: were in some careful way remote from
the pent inflammables in every breast. And Tom had suddenly the vision
of fireworks, blazing in a night above a score of hands that flashed
white and calm in the broken darkness. Men and women displaying fire
only outside themselves. Perhaps at the most, some inner rim of char.
He saw the goal of the grain-ward course he had been flowing. There was
the hostess.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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