But, stranger than all this, was the unmistakable atmosphere that
seemed to enter with him--an atmosphere that from one side
produced a sense of great fear and helplessness, and on the other
of a kind of security. In an instant Monsignor felt as a wounded
child might feel in the presence of a surgeon. And, throughout the
interview that followed, this sensation deepened incalculably.
The man said nothing--not even a word of greeting--as he came
across the room. He just inclined his head a little, with a grave
and business-like courtesy, and waved the other back into his
chair. Then, still standing himself, he began to speak in a deep
but quite quiet voice, and very slowly and distinctly.
"You understand, Monsignor, the terms on which you are here? Yes.
Very well. I do not wish you to say Mass until your last morning.
I have spoken to Father Jervis about you. . . .
"Meanwhile, for to-day you are at liberty to walk in the court
outside as much as you wish, to read as you wish--in fact, to
occupy yourself as you like in this room, the ambulatory
downstairs, the roof overhead, and the garden. You are to write
no letters, and to speak to no one. You will have your meals in
the next room alone, where you will also find a few books. I wish
you to get as quiet and controlled as you can. Tomorrow morning I
will come in again at the same time and give you further
directions. You will find a tribune opening out at the end of
this corridor, looking into a chapel where the Blessed Sacrament
is reserved. But I do not wish you to spend there more than one
hour in the course of the day."
The monk was silent again, and did not even raise his eyes.
Monsignor said nothing. There was really nothing to say. He felt
entirely powerless, and not even desirous to speak. He
understood that to obey was simply inevitable, and that silence
was what was wished.
"I do not wish you to rehearse at all what you intend to say to
me to-morrow," went on the monk suddenly. "You are here to show
me yourself and your wounds, and there must be no false shame.
You will say what you feel to-morrow; and I shall say what I
think. I wish you a happy retreat."
Then, again without a word, but with that same inclination of his
head, he went swiftly across the room and was gone.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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