Her words sounded like a knell in his soul. It seemed to him that they
had a dark, ominous meaning. He was not a nervous man, rather he was
strong, determined, not easily moved; but it seemed as though something
had gripped him, and he was afraid.
"I never dreamt when I went out," she said, "that I should do such a
good night's work--never dreamt that everything would come so easily."
And then she laughed.
"Tell me what you mean, mother."
"No, Paul, nothing. But you'll have a surprise--yes, you'll have a
surprise!"
She might have been mad. Her face was strange, her words were strange,
the look on her face was such as he had never seen before.
"Go to bed," she said. "Go to bed quickly. The maids will be up soon,
and they must suspect nothing. Sleep in peace, my boy; your debts
shall be paid, paid to the utmost farthing!"
He stooped to kiss her, and she threw her arms wildly round his neck.
"Oh, my lad, my lad!" she said; "morning is coming, the morning is
coming. There's a God in the Heavens after all! And yet, and yet----
Oh, Paul, I forgot, I forgot! Did I tell you that everything could be?
Nothing can be, my boy, nothing! I forgot! I forgot!"
And her voice almost rose to a scream.
"What is it, mother?"
She walked round the room like one demented. "I did not think of
that," she said. "I did not think of that. I thought I had made
everything plain. I thought, I thought, and now----"
"Tell me, mother, tell me!"
"No, I can't tell you. It would kill you--kill you; and I thought
there was a God in the heavens. And there isn't, Paul. There isn't.
Only the Devil lives. Oh, my boy! my boy! But leave me, leave me. I
must think, I must think. There, go away. Don't trouble about me,
Paul. I'm all right, I'm all right. But go away! Go away!" She
pushed him out of the room as she spoke, and locked the door behind him.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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