"What is there to tell?" replied the woman. "You deserted me, and Paul
was born--born in a workhouse, reared in a workhouse, educated in a
workhouse. He was called a 'workhouse brat' by the people. He lived
on the rates for years--your son! And I have only to speak and all the
world will know of it. Have you nothing to say for yourself?" And she
turned to him just as a caged lioness might turn to a keeper with whom
it was angry.
He stood with bowed head and never answered her a word. He seemed to
have forgotten everything in the thought that Paul Stepaside was his
son and he was accused of murder, and that he, his father, was his
judge.
"Have you nothing to say for yourself?" continued the woman. "Oh,
it'll be a beautiful story to tell to the world! I've been hearing
many things about you through the day. I'm told you speak at great
religious meetings, that you're a prominent religious leader, that you
advocate sending the Gospel to the heathen, that you're very particular
about attending to all religious observances. I've been reading what
you said about Paul being an atheist. You declared that men who had
given up faith in God were not to be trusted. When I tell my story,
won't the world laugh!"
He made no answer. He still stood perfectly motionless, with bowed
head. The woman's words did not seem to reach him.
"You know my Paul's story," she went on. "Therefore, I needn't repeat
it. He came to Brunford, and was falsely accused in this very city,
and you--because you were well paid and because I think your conscience
smote you and you felt an instinctive hatred towards him--you did your
best to get him a heavy punishment. Through you he was sent to
Strangeways Gaol for six months, he an innocent man! Then you fought
him at the election. You told all sorts of lies about him, and you
besmirched my name; he your son, and I your wife, the woman you
promised to love and cherish, and then deserted. Do you understand?
Do you understand?"
"Yes, I understand," he said; but still it did not seem like Judge
Bolitho's voice at all.
"But mind," and here her voice rose somewhat. "But mind, I'm your
wife. You married me. I'm your true lawful wife. You don't deny
that?"
"Jean," he said, "you don't know; you cannot know. But you'll forgive
me, won't you? I do not know myself, that is---- No, of course I
can't expect you to forgive me."
"Forgive you?" said the woman, and there was a world of scorn in her
tones. "Forgive you, when I've suffered twenty-five years of disgrace
because of you! Forgive you, when my son has been lying in gaol
because of you! Forgive you, when, but for you, he might be free now!
But there's a God in the heaven."
"And Paul Stepaside is my son, my son!"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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