"Son," said the judge, "some time, at all events, I hope I may be able
to make known the things which you have asked, but I cannot trust
myself to try and do so now. Will you let me be quiet for a few
minutes, my boy? I want to think. And will you try and forget this
part of the story?"
The judge sat down on the couch, while Paul, leaning against the prison
wall, watched him. Minute after minute passed away, and then the judge
spoke again.
"Paul," he said. "Are you guilty of this murder?"
"I would rather not discuss it with you," said Paul.
"My son," said the judge, "you do not believe what I have told you. To
you my words are a mockery. But I love you like my own life. Even
now, if I could die in your place I would be glad. At any rate I may
be able to help you. Mary doesn't believe you are guilty. She told me
so last night. I can speak freely of this now, for I am no longer the
one who shall sit in judgment on you, and I want to help you."
Paul looked at his father and wondered what was passing in his mind;
wondered, too, how much he knew. He could not tell him of his
suspicions, could not even hint at the fact that he believed his mother
was guilty of the murder for which he was accused. He knew of Judge
Bolitho's reputation; knew, too, that he would eagerly fasten upon
everything he learnt and follow it to its logical sequence.
In spite of everything, however, a change seemed to be coming over
their relationship. The feeling of half an hour before had somewhat
passed away. The sensations caused by their first meeting had become
less powerful.
"Whatever else I can do, Paul," said the judge, "I want to help you in
this. Can't you trust me?"
Paul was silent. He was afraid to answer directly, afraid lest the
haunting fear in his heart would become known. Then, in a way he could
not understand, he found himself talking with his father more freely,
found himself telling something of his life in Brunford, until by and
by he realised that he had been subjected to a close examination. It
seemed to him as though it had become a battle of wits between him and
his father; and although he was angry with himself afterwards, he knew
he had disclosed many things which he had sworn should never pass his
lips. Still, he had said nothing definite. He had never even hinted
at the possibility of his mother's guilt.
"If you could only trust me!" said the judge at length. "If you would
tell me exactly what happened, I might even yet be able to save you."
"Do you not believe me guilty, then?" said Paul.
"Mary does not," replied the judge.
"I know that," was Paul's answer. "And for her sake I mean to fight
for my own life."
"Even although you did this thing?"
"Even _if_ I did it!"
"But have you any evidence to add that shall tell in your
favour--anything that will destroy the impression which has been made?"
"Do you believe they will hang me if I don't?"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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