Manners and customs -- Fiction; Short stories, English
It was the unreproducible slid r, as he said this was his “fy-ist”
visit to England, that told me he was a New-Yorker from New York; and
when, in the course of our long, lazy journey westward from Waterloo,
he enlarged upon the beauties of his city, I, professing ignorance,
said no word. He had, amazed and delighted at the man’s civility, given
the London porter a shilling for carrying his bag nearly fifty yards;
he had thoroughly investigated the first-class lavatory compartment,
which the London and Southwestern sometimes supply without extra
charge; and now, half-awed, half-contemptuous, but wholly interested,
he looked out upon the ordered English landscape wrapped in its Sunday
peace, while I watched the wonder grow upon his face. Why were the cars
so short and stilted? Why had every other freight-car a tarpaulin drawn
over it? What wages would an engineer get now? Where was the swarming
population of England he had read so much about? What was the rank of
all those men on tricycles along the roads? When were we due at
Plymouth I told him all I knew, and very much that I did not. He was
going to Plymouth to assist in a consultation upon a fellow-countryman
who had retired to a place called The Hoe—was that up-town or
down-town—to recover from nervous dyspepsia. Yes, he himself was a
doctor by profession, and how any one in England could retain any
nervous disorder passed his comprehension. Never had he dreamed of an
atmosphere so soothing. Even the deep rumble of London traffic was
monastical by comparison with some cities he could name; and the
country—why, it was Paradise. A continuance of it, he confessed, would
drive him mad; but for a few months it was the most sumptuous rest-cure
in his knowledge.
“I’ll come over every year after this,” he said, in a burst of delight,
as we ran between two ten-foot hedges of pink and white may. “It’s
seeing all the things I’ve ever read about. Of course it doesn’t strike
you that way. I presume you belong here? What a finished land it is!
It’s arrived. Must have been born this way. Now, where I used to
live—Hello! what’s up?”
The train stopped in a blaze of sunshine at Framlynghame Admiral, which
is made up entirely of the name-board, two platforms, and an overhead
bridge, without even the usual siding. I had never known the slowest of
locals stop here before; but on Sunday all things are possible to the
London and Southwestern. One could hear the drone of conversation along
the carriages, and, scarcely less loud, the drone of the bumblebees in
the wallflowers up the bank. My companion thrust his head through the
window and sniffed luxuriously.
“Where are we now?” said he.
“In Wiltshire,” said I.
“Ah! A man ought to be able to write novels with his left hand in a
country like this. Well, well! And so this is about Tess’s country,
ain’t it? I feel just as if I were in a book. Say, the conduc—the guard
has something on his mind. What’s he getting at?”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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