The Days of My Life: An AutobiographyOliphant, Mrs. (Margaret)
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The Days of My Life: An Autobiography
Oliphant, Mrs. (Margaret)
Oliphant, Mrs. (Margaret), 1828-1897
"You have, indeed, changed your mind," said Miss Saville, with a smile
which was rather grim. "But, indeed, I don't wonder at it. I never
expected anything else, and it was only a fancy with you. You have
enough of natural duties at home. But here is how the case stands with
me, my dears. The Rector may marry--I hope he will--indeed, I may say
that there is great hope of it. I have enough to keep myself, but I have
nothing to do. I should like to be near William--I mean the Rector; but
what would become of me if I was idle, do you think? I did once think of
gathering a few clever girls about me, and setting up an establishment
for church embroidery; but William--the Rector, I mean--very justly
says, that I could not afford to give such expensive things away, and to
receive payment for them--though only for the materials--would be
unbecoming a lady; so I think it was quite a providential suggestion
when I thought of taking care of the aged poor at Cottisbourne. Hark!
did you hear any one call me, my dear?"
"No, Miss Saville. Are you looking for any one?" said Flora, perceiving
our companion's anxiety for the first time.
"No--no!--no!" said Miss Saville, hurriedly, "I cannot say I am. A
friend who is visiting us, strayed out by himself--that is all. He does
not know the country. I am afraid he might miss his way," she
continued, in a very quick, conscious, apologetic tone.
And suddenly there came to my recollection, the face I had once seen at
the Rectory window. Could this man be under _surveillance_ by them?
Could he be crazy, or in disgrace? Could he have escaped? I became
suddenly very curious--almost excited. I looked into the corners of the
hedges, henceforward, as carefully as Miss Saville did herself.
And in my exaggerated disinterestedness, and desire for pain rather than
pleasure, I was offended with her plain and simple statement of what her
design was in setting up this asylum of hers. I said, not without a
little sarcasm:
"If it is only for occupation, Miss Saville, I think Sally herself could
give you enough to do."
"Who is old Sally?" asked Flora, with a wondering glance at me.
"A wretched, ghastly, miserable old woman," said, I; "one who would
disgust even you, with all your meekness, Flora."
"Mamma says we should never be disgusted with any one," said Flora, in
an under-tone--in which, shy as it was, my quick ear could not fail to
detect a slight mixture of disapprobation.
"But this is a selfish, discontented, unhappy creature, who looks as if
she could curse every one happier than herself," said I.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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