The Days of My Life: An AutobiographyOliphant, Mrs. (Margaret)
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The Days of My Life: An Autobiography
Oliphant, Mrs. (Margaret)
Oliphant, Mrs. (Margaret), 1828-1897
We went in together to the library. My father was reading papers, some
of those long straggling papers tied together at the top, which always
look so ominous, and are so long-winded. His book was put away, and
instead he had pen and ink and his great blotting-book before him. My
father had been writing much and reading little, during these two weeks;
the occupation of his life was rudely broken in upon by these
arrangements, and though I could not understand how it was that he had
so much business thrown upon him, the fact seemed to be certain. There
was more life even in the room, it was less orderly, and there was a
litter of papers upon the table. My father looked well, pale, and
self-possessed, but not so deadly calm, and he called Harry to him with
a kind and familiar gesture. I had not yet overcome the embarrassment
which I always felt when I was with them both; and when I saw that my
father was pointing out sundry things in the papers to Harry, that they
were consulting about them, and that I was not a necessary spectator, I
turned over some books for a few minutes, and then I turned to go away.
When he saw me moving towards the door, my father looked up. "Wait a
little, Hester, I may want you by and by," he said. I was obedient and
came back, but I did not like being here with Harry. I did not feel that
our young life and our bright prospects were fit to intrude into this
hermit's room, and I wondered if it would look drearier or more
solitary--if my father would feel any want of me in my familiar place,
when I went away.
But I had very little reason to flatter myself that he would miss me. He
conducted all these matters with a certain satisfaction, I thought. He
was glad to have me "settled;" and though I think he had been kinder
than usual ever since that night, he had never said that it would grieve
him to part with me, or that the house would be sad when I was gone.
There was a pause in their consultation. I heard, for I did not see,
because I had turned to the window, and they were behind me, and then my
father said--"Come here, Hester, we have now talked together of these
arrangements--sit down by me, here, and see if it will not distress you
too much to hear the programme of the drama in which you are to be a
principal actor--here is a chair, sit down."
I turned, and went slowly to the seat he pointed out to me. I was very
reluctant, but I could not disobey him, not even though I saw Harry's
face bending forward eagerly to know if this was disagreeable to me.
"In the first place," said my father with a smile, "it is perhaps well
that Hester is no heiress, as she once was supposed to be. Had my
daughter inherited the family estate, her husband must have taken her
name, and that is a harder condition than the one I stipulated for."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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