She rose to her feet. "I have done wrong," she said, more quietly. "He
is in God's hands. Yes, it is for God to punish him."
Then Dan said, in a heart-rending voice:
"Mona, he did not mean to kill Ewan--they fought--it was all in the heat
of blood."
Once more he tried to avoid her gaze, and once more, pale and immovable,
she watched his face.
"Who is he?" she asked, with an awful calmness.
"Mona, turn your face away from me, and I will tell you," he said.
Then everything swam about her, and her pale lips grew ashy.
"Don't you know?" he asked in a whisper.
She did not turn her face, and he was compelled to look at her now. His
glaring eyes were fixed upon her.
"Don't you know?" he whispered again, and then, in a scarcely audible
voice, he said, "It was I, Mona."
At that she grew cold with horror. Her features became changed beyond
recognition. She recoiled from him, stretched her trembling hands before
her as if to keep him off.
"Oh, horror! Do not touch me!" she cried, faintly, through the breath
that came so hard.
"Do not spare me, Mona," he said in a great sob. "Do not spare me. You
do right not to spare me. I have stained my hands with your blood."
Then she sank to the settle, and held her head, while he stood by her
and told her all--all the bitter, blundering truth--and bit by bit she
grasped the tangled tale, and realized the blind passion and pain that
had brought them to such a pass, and saw her own unwitting share in it.
And he on his part saw the product of his headstrong wrath, and the
pitiful grounds for it, so small and so absurd as such grounds oftenest
are. And together these shipwrecked voyagers on the waters of life sat
and wept, and wondered what evil could be in hell itself if man in his
blindness could find the world so full of it.
And Dan cursed himself and said:
"Oh, the madness of thinking that if either were gone the other could
ever again know one hour's happiness with you, Mona. Ay, though the
crime lay hidden, yet would it wither and blast every hour. And now,
behold, at the first moment, I am bringing my burden of sin, too heavy
for myself, to you. I am a coward--yes, I am a coward. You will turn
your back upon me, Mona, and then I shall be alone."
She looked at him with infinite compassion, and her heart surged within
her as she listened to his voice of great agony.
"Ah me! and I asked God to curse you," she said. "Oh, how wicked that
prayer was! Will God hear it? Merciful Father, do not hear it. I did not
know what I said. I am a blind, ignorant creature, but Thou seest and
knowest best. Pity him, and forgive him. Oh, no, God will not hear my
wicked prayer."
Thus in fitful outbursts she talked and prayed. It was as if a tempest
had torn up every tie of her soul. Dan listened, and he looked at her
with swimming eyes.
"And do you pray for me, Mona?" he said.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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